Child Tantrums: Are They Still Normal or Excessive? Here Are the Signs

Tantrums are common in children, especially toddlers and preschoolers. They usually occur when a child is hungry, tired, frustrated, or wants something. To a certain extent, tantrums are part of the emotional development process in children.

However, parents should beware if tantrums occur too often, last too long, or are accompanied by aggressive behaviour. Citing Hello Sehat, excessive tantrums may signal developmental or mental health problems in children.

Every child has a different level of emotional expression. Some rarely have tantrums, others are more expressive. Nevertheless, a frequency that is too high deserves attention.

For preschoolers who spend more time at home, parents can observe whether the child experiences tantrums around 10-20 times a month or even more than five times a day for several consecutive days.

If this pattern occurs, the child may be at risk of experiencing more serious emotional disorders.

In children with normal emotional development, a tantrum typically subsides after a while and the next episode tends to be shorter. Conversely, in children with certain mental health problems, the duration can be long and persistent, even with no signs of subsiding.

Some children may kick or hit during a tantrum. However, if aggressive behaviour such as hitting, pinching, kicking, or throwing objects occurs repeatedly and endangers those around them, this is already abnormal.

In some cases, families even have difficulty calming the child and may need to protect themselves.

Tantrums accompanied by repeated physical violence require immediate special attention.

A more serious sign is when the child hurts themselves while angry. For example biting the hand, scratching the skin, banging the head against a wall, or kicking a hard object to the point of injury.

This behaviour may indicate emotional disorders requiring further evaluation.

Tantrums generally occur because a child wants attention or something they want. At certain ages, the child is not yet able to regulate their emotions and thus needs parental help to calm down.

However, parents should be careful not to always give in to the child’s demands every time they throw a tantrum. If not, the child may make tantrums a ‘tool’ to achieve their wishes.

When the child is calm, it is important to explain that every behaviour has consequences. Usually, as they reach school age, children begin to understand the impact of their actions on their social environment.

Besides developmental factors, excessive tantrums can also be related to certain mental health conditions.

• ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), which makes a child impulsive and difficult to regulate emotions.

• Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), which causes communication and emotion-regulation difficulties.

• Anxiety disorders, which make a child respond excessively to situations considered frightening.

• Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), characterised by defiant and easily angered behaviour.

• Mood disorders, such as depression or bipolar disorder in children, which trigger extreme mood changes.

However, not every child who tantrums frequently will have a mental disorder. Further assessment by professionals is required to confirm the cause.

Parents are advised to consult with a psychologist or paediatrician if tantrums occur almost daily, last a long time, endanger themselves or others, and disrupt the child’s daily activities.

Early detection and management can help a child learn to regulate their emotions more healthily.