Srimben, Balinese woman behind presidents

Alit Kertaraharja, Contributor, Singaraja

As every Indonesian knows, Sukarno was the first president and his daughter, Megawati Soekarnoputri, is now the fifth president, the first such succession in the nation's post-independence history. Few, however, know about the woman behind these two- generation successes.

Her name was Ida Ayu Nyoman Rai Srimben.

In the early 1900s, Srimben was born as a daughter in the Brahmana high priest family in Buleleng, North Bali.

She lived her life as a member of the Banjar Bale Agung clan by conducting prime duties in the family and her community. Her duties included praying, weaving, making traditional textiles, dancing, mekidung (singing Balinese verses) and ngayah (serving in the community).

Her fate changed dramatically when she met a handsome school teacher, Raden Mas Soekemi Sosrodihardjoe, at tweede klasse scholen (elementary school during Dutch colonialism), which is now the SDN 1 Singaraja public elementary school.

Her family never expected Srimben to marry a Javanese man. In the early 20th century, an interfaith, inter-ethnic marriage was taboo in Bali.

Luh Ayu, 85, and Nyoman Gel Gel, 70, Srimben's living relatives recalled their memories.

"In the past, kin marriage was common among Balinese people, especially among the high-caste, which wanted to maintain its pure blood," they said.

The Banjar Bale Agung clan held a very strict rule and tradition concerning marriages of its members. "Women in our family were prohibited from marrying males in lower castes," Luh said.

But the beautiful, soft-voiced Srimben made her toughest decision in her life by eloping with Soekemi and, in doing so, leaving her beloved family and traditions behind.

"At that time, her action was considered very risky by Balinese women, but Srimben was so courageous to elope with Soekemi," she said, adding that her move reflected both persistence and rebellion against a rigid tradition.

Balinese tradition dictates that marriage to an outsider from a different ethnic and religious group warrants "family and communal" banishment.

By marrying Soekemi, Srimben was banned for life from entering the family house, praying at pura (temple) and was excluded from any traditional and religious ceremonies.

Luh said that, although the young couple only lived 100 meters away from the whole clan, Srimben was never seen entering the gate of her family home.

"The big family and Srimben actually had owed one important ceremony called mepamit," said Made Arsana, a priest at Dadia Pasek Bale Agung.

When a Balinese girl married to a man outside her family, she must carry out mepamit, a ceremony to bid farewell to her ancestral home and temple. After the marriage, a woman would belong to her husband's puruse (big clan).

"But when Srimben got married to Soekemi, the Banjar Bale Agung clan had never conducted mepamit ritual to spiritually and morally release their daughter Srimben from any family's rights and obligations," said Arsana.

The ritual is very urgent to cut off the spiritual ties between Srimben and her ancestors of the clan. Balinese people strongly believe in the Niskala (spiritual realm).

"We are expecting Megawati, as her direct descendant, to represent Srimben to perform the mepamit ritual. So far, there has been no green light from her," said Arsana.

While visiting the elderly Srimben in her home in Blitar, East Java, years ago, another Srimben's cousin, Putu Ayu, claimed she heard the old woman still mekidung.

"She still had vividly remembered her family members in Banjar Bale Agung and kept asking me whether the girls mastered dancing and mekidung," recalled Putu.