Simons Says: The 'sweet science' soured again by big body blow

Greetings sports fans! This is the inaugural edition of Simons Says, with our opening column dedicated to boxing after the recent world featherweight title fight between home fave and WBA belt holder Chris John and former champ American Derrick Gainer.

A group of boxing aficionados and I watched the fight with a keen eye but were flabbergasted by the scoring. According to the 10-point must system, the fighter deemed to have won the round gets 10 points, and unless there is a knockdown or an absolute pummeling, his opponent gets nine. In the case of a knockdown -- as Chris John suffered in the first round -- he loses that round 10-8.

The judges all had Chris John with scores of 118, meaning they had him winning every round from two through 12 (11 times 10, plus 8). Flat out impossible! Gainer clearly won a handful of rounds in the first half of the fight, maybe even five or six of them.

Judging criteria: 25 percent for defense; 25 for clean punches that land, not on elbows or gloves; 25 for "ring generalship"; and the last 25 is for general aggressive. Chris John easily took the fourth category, but Gainer far outdid him on defense and clean, powerful punches, especially in rounds one through seven.

At the end of the fight, my cohorts and I all agreed that Chris John would take it by a point or retain his belt by draw. The dissenting opinion came from a Canadian analyst -- he also believes Carl Lewis is as guilty as Ben Johnson -- who stated, "I never saw Chris John get a clean punch in, and Gainer rocked him with lightning counter punches."

And yet, despite it all, one judge scored it 118-109! In the words of Frank Zappa (God rest his soul), "There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, but stupidity has a longer shelf life." Or maybe the WBA needs to send that judge to the eye doctor, pronto!

Not to take anything away from Chris John; he is a tenacious, fun fighter to watch with a big "up-side" and seems like a fine young man and top sportsman -- very rare qualities these days in the "sweet science".

Trivia time: Who is the only non-gold medalist Olympic boxer to be awarded the Val Barker Cup as Most Outstanding Boxer in the games? (answer to follow)

They said it:

* British boxer Henry Cooper, replying to boxing abolitionist, Baroness Edith Summerskill, who said: "Mr. Cooper, have you seen the state of your nose?"

"Well madam, have you seen the state of your nose? Boxing is my excuse. What's yours?"

* "I fought Sugar so many times that I'm lucky I didn't get diabetes." -- Jake LaMotta, referring to his epic title fights with Ray Robinson

* "When Mike Tyson gets mad, you don't need a referee, you need a priest." -- Jim Murray, legendary LA Times columnist

* "I ain't never heard o' him. I s'pose he's one of dem foreign heavyweights. They'z all lousy. Sure as hell I'll moider da bum." -- "Two-Ton" Tony Galento, 1930s heavyweight boxer, when asked what he thought of William Shakespeare.

The heavy-hitting, cigar-chomping, beer-guzzling, New Jerseyite once fought Joe Louis for the title and was considered the hardest hitter in the sport during his era, if not a literary giant.

This Week in History: * April 27, 1956: Rocky Marciano retired as undefeated world heavyweight boxing champion. * April 28, 1967: Boxing champion Muhammad Ali refused to be inducted into the U.S. Army.

Trivia answer: Roy Jones Jr., in the 156-pound class at the 1988 Olympics in Seoul, Korea. Interestingly, he is also the boyhood chum of and mentor to the aforementioned Derrick Gainer. Jones, now considered one of the best boxers "pound-for-pound" of all time, was the United States' "sure thing" to win gold in Seoul, and, as expected, he ran roughshod over the competition in reaching the final against hometown fave Park Si-Hun.

Despite a pummeling of epic proportions that left the outclassed Korean bloodied, stupefied but standing -- albeit listing dreadfully -- Jones was robbed of gold on a 3-2 vote in what is now known as the most disgraceful judging scandal in Olympic history.

It would later be discovered that a Korean syndicate (in cahoots with the East German Stasi!!) bribed three judges. Jones, however, was awarded the Val Barker Cup as the Olympics' Most Outstanding Boxer, which has never happened before or since.

-- Rich Simons

Send comments on this column to bruce@thejakartapost.com and Rich will try to publish them in the "mailbag" section each week.