RI girls in U.S. need chaperones

N was a nice girl from a well-to-do family in Jakarta. She was fair-skinned, tall, charming and had a sunny character. In short, she was the ideal teenager, and like every teenager of an affluent family, she intended to study in the United States. After finding the desired school in Oklahoma, she traveled to Uncle Sam's country and rented an apartment.

As time went on, her parents were pleased in the belief that "no news is good news" or in other words, everything is going well.

After a time lapse of six months, the parents intended to pay the daughter a surprise visit, so they started on their long journey to the United States, via Japan.

During the parents' absence, a phone call was received by the members of the family from the United States, saying that the caller wanted to speak to the girl's parents. The recipient of the call thought that it was of no importance so he was inclined to ignore it, which made the caller furious. The caller said bluntly that the girl, N, had died, and that the police wanted to speak to her parents.

Realizing that a terrible thing must have overcome the girl, the people at home informed the caller that the parents were in fact on their way to Oklahoma to visit their daughter. Once the police knew of the route of the plane from Tokyo to Oklahoma, they especially went to meet the parents in Vancouver, Canada.

The FBI told the unfortunate parents that a schoolmate had apparently tried to abuse the girl. As the victim vehemently resisted tooth and nail, the attacker repeatedly stabbed her. The stab wounds inflicted on the girl must have been terrible, because the FBI man showed only the face of the deceased. Needless to say that the parents were stricken with grief and I believe that the deathly ashen faced of their beloved daughter will be imprinted in their minds forever.

A former colleague of mine, who happened to be a distant relative of the parents, had great difficulty in holding back his tears, when relating the sad story to me. Undoubtedly our life is in God's hands, yet it is well to take some precautions, especially in the case of a girl who studies abroad.

Some mothers are wise enough to act as the chaperones of their grownup daughters. A relative of mine who received word that his daughter who studies in the United States was going to stay with her boyfriend, sent his wife to stay there until the daughter finished her studies. Another cautious mother from another family whose daughter was studying overseas asked her unmarried sister to act as the chaperone of the girl.

Of course, customs and traditions are different in every country, but for respectable Asian families, cohabitation of unmarried couples is definitely frowned upon.

A. DJUANA

Jakarta