Psychologist: Understand Your Own Limits When Responding to Others’ Concerns

Jakarta (ANTARA) - Clinical child and adolescent psychologist Ocha Ananda Suherik said that being someone others can confide in is an important form of care, but it is also necessary to recognise the limits of one’s capacity to help.

“Self-boundaries help us recognise the limits of our abilities, time, emotional energy and responsibilities when supporting others,” Ocha told ANTARA in Jakarta on Saturday.

She said one way to do this was to recognise the limits of one’s role. As a friend or family member, someone can offer support, but does not have to take on the role of a psychologist or psychiatrist.

“If, at that moment, you do not have enough energy or emotional capacity, or the issue being shared is too difficult, communicate your limits clearly and empathetically. You can also offer help that is within your capacity,” said Ocha, who is a member of the Indonesian Psychological Association (HIMPSI).

Ocha said that when someone begins opening up about a problem they are facing, the first thing to recognise is that talking about it is not always easy.

She said responses could include listening without judgement and not rushing to offer solutions.

Give the person the opportunity to share their experience according to their own readiness and pace.

“It is important to distinguish between validating someone’s emotions and automatically agreeing with all their thoughts or behaviour,” said Ocha, a graduate of the University of Indonesia.

For example, she said, it is possible to understand that someone feels extremely angry without endorsing actions that harm others as a result of that anger.

“Ask what kind of help they need. Avoid comparing their problem with others’ or minimising it. Protect their trust and privacy,” Ocha said.