Pregnancy no reason to put a stop to sex

Emmy Fitri, The Jakarta Post, Jakarta

For some parents-to-be, pregnancy can lead to the interruption of sexual activity, which for most people is linked to the fear of harming the womb.

"I'm reluctant to have sex with my wife, not because she is no longer pretty or anything like that. I'm just afraid something might happen to my baby," said "Adolf", an employee of a travel agent.

His wife was three-months pregnant and did not show any resentment over her husband's unwillingness for sex.

"I once read an article that said it's okay to have sex during pregnancy but I have also heard from many people who say that it's not supposed to be done because our tradition and culture prohibits it," Adolf added.

So far, however, there has been no evidence to suggest that sexual intercourse can damage the womb, noted sex consultant Boyke Dian Nugraha in a recent interview.

Boyke even suggested that sexual activity -- in whatever form -- should be continued right up until the last months of pregnancy.

"Sex is an expression of love, and pregnant women, with all the changes they have to go through, will be able to carry on their pregnancy more smoothly and enjoyably if they feel that they are still physically wanted by their husbands," Boyke remarked.

He said that couples should discuss anything that curb's the man's regular sexual activity, which was not caused by a decrease in sexual desire. He added that a husband's openness can help his wife to accept the fact.

"Many women are often left to themselves to figure out what happened to their husbands. They must know that it is not because of them, it is men's natural psychological response. However, men should fight that and start to see it in a new perspective," Boyke stressed.

Pregnancy often creates an increased need for physical affection by women -- a craving that may be greater than the desire for sexual satisfaction.

For that reason, Boyke said, sex during pregnancy should be encouraged as long as there is nothing wrong with the pregnancy.

"If the woman has had a miscarriage before, fetal membrane fraction, infected womb, or a history of yeast infection, she has to be careful during sexual intercourse," he said, adding that there were recommended sexual positions for a couple expecting a child.

"The most favorable positions are when the woman is on top, an elevated position and when the man takes the woman from behind."

Boyke explained that toward the end of pregnancy, progesterone levels in the blood begin to fall, which is believed to allow the uterus to begin more extensive contractions.

Coinciding with the fall of progesterone, there is also an increase in estrogen and a rise in the level of the hormone from the posterior part of the mother's pituitary gland.

This hormone is known as oxytocin and, in the presence of estrogen, it stimulates uterine contractions so effectively that it may be used by a doctor to induce birth, if the uterus itself is slow to react at the end of pregnancy.

At www.lamaze.com, it is written that pregnancy is also a wonderful time to explore different aspects of love-making such as cuddling, holding each other and discovering new positions and ways of giving, receiving pleasure.

The website also reports that each couple's experience is unique. A woman's reactions to sexual activity tends to be closely tied to her stage of pregnancy, while a man's reactions tend to be consistent throughout the wife's pregnancy.

Many women experience improved sensitivity during pregnancy and find orgasms last longer.

Studies also show that sexual intercourse until the final three months of pregnancy does not cause premature labor, a difference in weight of a newborn baby, length of pregnancy or the health of the fetus.

The website even said that the hormone, prostaglandins, which is sometimes used to induce labor, was present in semen, but not in amounts sufficient enough to induce an abortion.

For that theory, Boyke confirmed and shared his experience with a mother who still hadn't given birth a week after the predicted delivery time.

"The doctor told her to go home and have sex with her husband, which she did. It worked. The next morning she had strong contractions and gave birth that same day," he recalled.

As that example shows, there is no reason to stop having sex during pregnancy.

Men's possible reactions to sex during pregnancy

* Anxieties: decreased desire for sex -- physical awkwardness -- fear of harming fetus -- worry that doctor may call for abstinence from sex

* Joys: being turned on by increased breast size -- love of extra weight and roundness of partner's belly -- freedom from contraception concerns -- new ways of giving, receiving pleasure -- the fun of finding new positions