How to Limit Children’s Screen Time Without Causing Conflict

Jakarta (ANTARA) – Limiting children’s use of devices is often a challenge for parents. Children may cry, become angry or refuse when their phone time ends, particularly if the device has become part of their daily routine. This can lead to arguments if rules are imposed suddenly and without explanation.

However, device use is not always harmful. Digital devices can help children learn, find information and communicate. What matters is how long they use them, what content they access, and whether these activities interfere with sleep, play, learning and family interaction.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), in guidance updated in January 2026, stresses the importance of adapting digital media use to children’s ages and needs. Parents are also encouraged to agree on device use with their children rather than imposing one-sided bans.

Children’s internet use is also a concern in Indonesia. A UNICEF Indonesia study published in February 2025 found that most of the children surveyed used the internet every day, mainly for socialising and entertainment.

The study also found that 42 per cent of children felt uncomfortable or frightened because of experiences online. This highlights the importance of parental guidance in developing healthy and safe digital habits.

Reducing screen time is easier when children understand the rules. Parents can discuss with them when devices may be used, how long they can play, and when devices need to be put away.

Agreements should take account of a child’s age, school timetable, learning needs and family routines. Children can also be given a say in choosing suitable times to play, provided this does not interfere with their responsibilities or rest.

This approach helps children understand that rules are intended to maintain a balance of activities, rather than simply take away something they enjoy. The AAP recommends drawing up a family media plan together and reviewing it regularly as children develop.

Gradually reduce screen time

Stopping device use abruptly can make it difficult for children to adapt. If a child is used to watching videos for hours, parents can begin to reduce the time little by little while explaining the changes.

For example, viewing time that usually lasts two hours can be reduced gradually, depending on the child’s age and needs. Parents should ensure the reduction does not come at the expense of important activities such as learning, sleep, play and time with family.

The AAP says children may become angry or cry when asked to stop using a digital device. Planning ahead, applying consistent rules and responding calmly can help reduce conflict when screen time ends.

Children absorbed in a game or video may find it difficult to stop suddenly. Parents can therefore give them a few minutes’ warning before their device time is up.

For example, tell a child that 10 minutes of play remain, then remind them again when there are five minutes left. A timer or the device’s own time-limit feature can also be used.

This gives children time to prepare to move on to another activity. Once the time is up, parents should calmly stick to the agreement instead of prolonging the argument or repeatedly allowing extra time.

Prepare appealing alternatives

Taking away a device without offering another activity can leave a child bored and deprived of a familiar source of entertainment. Parents should therefore prepare alternatives that suit the child’s interests.

These could include playing outdoors, drawing, reading a storybook, building with blocks, cooking together or playing a simple game with family members.

The World Health Organization (WHO) stresses the importance of physical activity, adequate sleep and reducing sedentary screen time for children under five.

For two-year-olds, sedentary screen time is recommended to be no more than one hour a day. The limit is also one hour a day for children aged three to four, with less being preferable.

Children tend to pay attention to the habits of those around them, including how their parents use phones. If children are not allowed to use devices at mealtimes while their parents continue looking at screens at the table, the rule may seem unfair.

Parents can establish new habits by putting phones away during family meals, talking with children without notification interruptions and reducing device use before bedtime.

In 2026, the AAP recommended screen-free times for all family members, including during meals, homework and before bed. These habits create space for physical activity, rest, reading and face-to-face interaction.

Use parental controls

Parental controls can help manage device-use duration, restrict certain apps, filter content by age, and control downloads and purchases.

These features are available on various devices and platforms, including phones, tablets, gaming consoles and some digital services. Parents can use them to help implement agreements they have made with their children.

However, these features should still be accompanied by communication. Children need to understand why limits are in place and that the rules are intended to maintain a balance of activities and keep them safe online.

Crying or anger when screen time ends does not necessarily mean a child is addicted to devices. Children who are still learning to manage their emotions may struggle with a change of activity, particularly when tired, hungry or bored.

When this happens, parents should avoid shouting, threats or lengthy lectures. State the limit simply, for example: “I know you still want to play, but your time is up. Let’s have a rest now.”

If the child remains angry, give them time to calm down while keeping the situation safe. Once they have settled, parents can talk with them about their feelings and the agreed rules.

The AAP advises parents to remain calm, acknowledge children’s feelings and maintain the limits they have set. If emotional outbursts occur almost every time device use is stopped, or begin to affect sleep, eating, school or social relationships, parents can consult a paediatrician.

Ultimately, limiting screen time is not simply about reducing the amount of time children spend looking at screens. Parents also need to ensure device use does not displace sleep, physical activity, learning and social interaction.

With clear agreements, parental role-modelling and enjoyable alternative activities, children can learn to use digital devices in a more balanced way without every limit ending in an argument.