GAMAS: More than just a father escorting his child

A man with the initials MY (34) recently sent a message containing a bomb threat to a teacher at SDN Srengseng Sawah 15 Pagi. The WhatsApp message contained a threat from the terrorist to detonate bombs at 11 points in the school and demanded that the school not report it to the police. The moment coincided with the first day of the School Environment Introduction Period (MPLS) at the school, when many fathers were escorting their children to school. The threat prompted the police to deploy the Gegana Team and K-9 sniffer dogs to sweep the school. The man was arrested, and indeed no bomb was found. However, something truly exploded: a child’s sense of security. In fact, a father’s presence at that moment is not only about helping a child adapt to a new environment but also an opportunity to build emotional closeness. Ultimately, the impact of the incident was also felt by the perpetrator’s child, who had to leave their school. Child psychologist Gloria Siagian believes the Gerakan Ayah Mengantar Anak di Hari Pertama Sekolah (GAMAS) should not be interpreted merely as escorting a child to the school gate. According to her, more than that, a father’s presence needs to be genuinely felt by the child. There are many opportunities for a child to bond with their father, from listening to the child’s stories and understanding their feelings when entering a new environment, to providing a sense of security. Conversely, if a father escorts his child while venting anger, is busy with a mobile phone, or does not pay attention to the child, the meaning of that presence is lost. The father figure is often viewed as a symbol of strength in the family. Therefore, a father’s involvement on the first day of school can help a child gain self-confidence when entering a new environment. Not only through togetherness, children also learn from the way fathers express emotions. According to the psychologist, a father is a role model, especially for boys, so daily behaviour is more easily imitated than advice given. ‘If, for example, the father is used to being angry, the child will model that the way to express emotions is by being angry, shouting like that,’ she said. The psychologist stated that emotions, whether anger or sadness, are basically neutral. What needs to be controlled is the behaviour when that emotion arises. Therefore, parents need to get used to recognising the emotions they feel, understanding the cause, and then expressing them in a healthy way. ‘So expressing emotions is allowed and healthy, but the child must not get hurt,’ she said. A child in such a situation has the potential to experience confusion because, on one hand, they love their parent, but on the other hand, school is a place that has been a safe space for them. In addition, the child also risks facing stigma from the environment, losing self-confidence, and developing feelings of shame and anger over the incident. Assistance needs to be provided not only to the child but also to the parents so that parenting patterns can change to become healthier. Meanwhile, the school also has an important role in restoring the child’s relationship with the environment through support from teachers, guidance and counselling (BK) teachers, and the headmaster. In this way, the child can feel safe again, build trust in the school, parents, and themselves, and grow up without being constantly haunted by a mistake that was not theirs. This is reflected in a father named Ridho, who wakes up every day at 5:00 AM WIB to escort his child to the State Special School (SLB) Negeri 02 Jakarta before leaving for the office.