Count to 100 to escape trouble

Count to 100 to escape trouble

JAKARTA (JP): A former U.S. President prayed before being sworn in, "Lord, please keep my big mouth shut until I know what I am talking about."

He had a very good reason for saying the prayer. Embarrassment or even serious problems can stem from a careless word. However, blunders are sometimes unavoidable. When you are angry or excited, you're apt to say something without thinking. Even when you are in a good mood there is always a possibility that you will say something you will regret. Barbara Bush, when she and George were occupying the White House, went all-out to calm farmers and mothers angry about her hubby's comment that he didn't like broccoli.

A friend of mine was sued and spent a month behind bars just because he made a bad remark about somebody who turned out to be a strongman. An artist had to vanish from the stardom because she mentioned something that caused a rain of protests. And the newspapers are full of Indonesians being prosecuted for what they have said.

I once lost a nice friend because I joked about his head. I didn't know how sensitive his head was to him. Sure, he accepted my apology, but our warm friendship ended and I still can't forgive myself for being so thoughtless.

Speaking in front of a sleepy audience is another tricky job. During seminars, discussions and informal talks, Indonesians tend to get sleepy, especially when their stomachs are full and the topic is boring. The speaker sometimes get carried away with the situation and resorts to getting the audience's attention by making a joke or saying something sensitive. This can be a mistake.

Ordinary people can get out of it by exclaiming, "Oh me and my big mouth" and get away with their blunder. But slips by celebrities can lead to serious problems. They could lose face, popularity and fortunes. The relationship between two countries in our neighborhood once soured because of a "slip of the tongue" at the top level.

SPARKS from the ANVIL, a magazine specializing in the digest of wit, gives its readers valuable advice on keeping their mouths shut. One piece of advice comes from Thomas Jefferson, another former American president: "When angry, count to ten before you speak; when very angry, count to one hundred."

The advice is still relevant in todays world. Even when you're not angry, it is still advisable to pause before you speak. During seminars, in particular, better to count before waking up the dozing audience with a sensitive joke. Let them sleep. It's safer.

-- Carl Chairul