Behind the Decision to Renounce Indonesian Citizenship

Human life is unpredictable. Its path often moves forward in unplanned directions, taking people to places, decisions, and identities they might never have previously imagined. In 2005, Merry, a woman from Bekasi, left her family and comfortable home for the first time. She moved to Venlo, a small city in the Netherlands bordering Germany, to follow her husband. In this new country, Merry started everything from scratch. Language was the first wall she had to face. Adaptation was not easy; feelings of alienation, loneliness, and homesickness often arrived together. Twenty years have passed unnoticed. Now, dressed neatly and walking with a steady step, Merry attended a naturalisation ceremony, a significant moment in her life’s journey. She was not alone in the room; a dozen other immigrants from various countries were also present, each carrying a long story of migration, searching, and hope for a more stable life. Merry took the oath of citizenship in Dutch, a language that once felt so foreign to her ears. In the oath, she pledged to obey the laws and values of the country. A local burgemeester, or mayor, then approached her, presenting flowers and a warm greeting as a sign of acceptance and official recognition as a member of Dutch society. ‘Initially, it was sad to renounce my Indonesian citizenship. Because no matter what, I was born and raised in Indonesia. I enjoyed my childhood, went to school, and have family there. So there is a heavy feeling,’ Merry said when contacted. The decision was not made overnight. Merry admitted she had been thinking about it for almost a decade. Inner turmoil, considerations for the future, and questions of self-identity constantly swirled in her head. Finally, in November 2024, she applied to change her status from permanent resident to Dutch citizen. The process moved faster than she imagined, and by February 2025, everything was completed. ‘I kept going back and forth, should I change or not,’ she said. ‘But seeing the conditions in Indonesia lately, I became more convinced to take Dutch citizenship.’ Merry mentioned that one of her considerations was disappointment with the social and political conditions she observed in Indonesia. From a newcomer who once struggled to understand the local language and customs, Merry slowly began to find her place. She works daily as a salesperson for a multinational company in the food and beverage raw materials sector. At home, the 43-year-old woman also fulfills her role as a mother to her two children. As a mother, she has directly experienced how the Dutch government supports families through various social facilities. One of the things that has allowed her to persevere is a living system that she feels provides a sense of security, especially for families with children. ‘What I feel as a mother is that we are calmer. We are not too stressed thinking about our children’s school fees,’ she said. ‘We don’t live a flashy life, we are not rich. I work hard, as an employee. But I feel it is enough.’ In the Netherlands, primary to secondary education receives state support. Additionally, families receive various child benefits, such as the periodic Kinderbijslag, to help with children’s needs. ‘The child subsidy does not look at whether the parents are rich or poor. As long as you have a child and meet the requirements, there is assistance. Young children get it, and as they get older, they still get it. There is support until the age of 18,’ Merry explained. According to her, this support allows parents to focus more on their children’s development, rather than just chasing income to cover basic needs. ‘For me, that is one of the things that makes living here comfortable. The state feels present. We still have to work, we still pay high taxes, but we know there is a system that helps if we have a family,’ she said. For Merry, this sense of security was one of the reasons she began to see the Netherlands not just as a temporary residence, but as home. Before finally deciding to change her citizenship, Merry actually tried to find an answer to whether Indonesia could still be a place for her and her family to return to. She sought that answer by going back to Indonesia. In 2017, Merry and her husband left the Netherlands and started a life in her homeland. At that time, the desire to return was not just nostalgia. Merry and her husband genuinely imagined Indonesia as a place to spend their future. They wanted to live a more relaxed life, be closer to family, and try to build their own business. ‘We thought at the time, maybe we could live in Indonesia for good. My husband had also been thinking about moving for a long time. He imagined a slower pace of life,’ Merry recounted. The plan was then put into action. They brought their children back to Bekasi and tried to live life in Indonesia. Merry even prepared a plan to open a business using the savings they had accumulated while living in the Netherlands. However, the reality they encountered was far different from what they had imagined. ‘At first I thought, this is my own country. It should be easier because I was born and raised here. But it turned out that when I lived in Indonesia again, I felt like a stranger,’ she revealed. Merry realised that the Indonesia she left in 2005 was no longer the same Indonesia she returned to more than a decade later. The change was not only in the environment, but also within herself. ‘I still like going to Indonesia for holidays. I enjoy going home, meeting family, eating Indonesian food. But living there again turned out to be different,’ she said.