What to do if your child wants to be an athlete

JAKARTA (JP): Sports has always been a topic of conversation in our family. We often discuss the latest news in soccer, badminton and other sports, rehashing matches and agonizing over the results.

So when my three-year-old son announced he wanted to be a soccer player, I was not prepared for my husband's reaction. I expected him to be supportive, but instead he reproached our son.

"I send you to school (actually he's still in playgroup) so you can be successful in life. I want you to become an engineer or a doctor or a banker. Not an athlete! End of conversation."

I reminded my husband that our son was only three years old and his wishes would change with time. It was just the comment of a child, so I didn't expect him to take the issue so seriously. And besides, what's wrong with being an athlete?

But my husband was adamant, saying being an athlete in Indonesia meant ending up penniless after retirement, with no help from the government or sports organizations.

He has a point, because that is exactly what has happened here. Some retired athletes survive by selling instant noodles near Bung Karno Stadium, while another is working as an ojek (motorcycle taxi) driver.

However, this sad situation is not true for all athletes. In certain sports -- particularly soccer, badminton and basketball -- athletes are able to make quite a bit of money.

Indonesia's number one men's shuttler, Taufik Hidayat, can earn up to Rp 70 million quarterly from sports-equipment sponsorships alone. And if he wins a five-star tournament, he pockets US$12,000, minus a 25 percent cut for the Badminton Association of Indonesia.

Receiving this information, which of course I got from newspapers, my husband quickly changed his mind. He took our son aside and told him: "If you insist on becoming a soccer player, I'll try to send you to Ajax Amsterdam or Manchester United. But when you become a success, make sure that every time the Soccer Association of Indonesia ask you to represent the country, they pay your appearance fee. I'll be your manager by then .... "

What a greedy businessman, I grumbled. He's just like a friend of mine who tends to exploit her kids, though in a bit of a different way.

My friend, a housewife, pushed her daughter very hard (too hard in my opinion) to become a tennis player. She took her to a well-known national coach at a club, and asked him if the four- year-old girl had the makings of another Yayuk Basuki.

When the coach said the girl had good posture, my friend smiled with satisfaction before asking when she could join the club.

Her smile quickly disappeared when he told her that besides good posture and talent, children must also be motivated to choose sports as a career.

"Becoming an athlete is not as easy as it looks. They have to be very disciplined with their time, with practicing and with their nutrition. They have to sacrifice their youths. Are you sure your daughter can do that? Are you prepared for her to quit school to focus on sports, particularly in this era?"

My friend just nodded, saying her daughter's classes were negotiable with her teachers. Looking at girl's face, I could tell she was despondent but was too afraid to say "No".

Both my husband and my friend are reflections of the situation in Indonesia today. There is a dearth of young sports talent in the country, but parents are afraid to let their children become athletes because there is no guarantee of monetary rewards.

Most parents tend to forget the one truly valuable thing sports offers children -- character building. Sports teaches people to compete fairly, to acknowledge other's victories and to accept their own defeats. Sports gives people the spirit to fight and to struggle, giving them the strength to survive in the world.

Children may not have the slightest desire to become professional athletes, but they should still be involved in sports from an early age. It is not only to keep them strong and healthy, but more importantly to prepare them for the future.

Several days later, my son was watching his favorite cartoon on TV when he shouted: "Look, there's an Oom (uncle) on TV. Wow, his body is so big like a giant." I saw him pointing at a biscuit commercial featuring Indonesian bodybuilder Ade Rai.

Then he turned to his father and said: "Can I be like him?" And again, my husband launched into his speech .....

-- Harini