What is a First Husband to do?

What is a First Husband to do?

JAKARTA (JP): In times of need, we call on the people who know
best what we are going through. They are a sympathetic shoulder
to cry on, an empathetic ear to pour out our troubles to and say
what is on our mind.

So, right now, I imagine there is a flurry of harried e-mails
going back and forth, fast and furious, between the home of
Megawati Soekarnoputri and Manila's Malacanang Palace.

For, amid all the ballyhoo about our new President as the
first woman to govern this country, plus all the jockeying for
positions in the Cabinet, one single, solitary figure has been
left out of the picture.

It's Mr. Megawati.

I don't imagine for a minute that Taufik Kiemas is sitting at
home in the shadows, biding his time with a diet of presidential
palace snacks and telenovellas as he waits for aforesaid Citizen
Number One to pull up in the driveway after a day of dealing with
the snakes in the jungle of politics.

Ready and waiting at the door with the afternoon newspaper and
a steaming hot cup of coffee? Not likely.

Of course, Taufik, a businessman and legislator, is better
prepared than most men to have to play second fiddle to his wife.
It came with the territory when he married the eldest daughter of
the country's first president, with that luminous last name which
still strikes awe and reverence in many a humble heart.

But, except for a few unwanted foreign media articles asking
questions about his business dealings, he has remained pretty
much in the background, a bit of a mystery, the dutiful husband
providing the moral sustenance for his wife.

Yet becoming a First Husband means that, like it or not, he
will have to deal with a bit more of the spotlight. He got a
first taste of it when the cameras captured his tearful reaction
in the legislature to the inevitability of a Megawati presidency.

At least one man, Mr. Arroyo, himself the subject of a few
prying questions about business deals, knows very well what he is
going through. I don't know about you, but I like to think that
perhaps they have been burning up the telephone lines, swapping
stories about their new positions in life.

Because, except for the world's First Ladies, Taufik and his
Philippine counterpart (now who remembers his first name?) do not
have many examples to live by. With the way of the world, there
have been scant male presidential or royal consorts to take as
examples.

In England and Sweden centuries ago, queens Elizabeth and
Christina chose to go it alone in leading their countries, while
Queen Victoria of Britain was forever in black after the love of
her life, Albert, died relatively young. Today, the husbands of
the few remaining female rulers (Denmark, the Netherlands) of the
world remain pretty much unseen and unheard.

There are exceptions, but perhaps their behavior is not the
best standard for Taufik to live by. Prince Philip, despite
keeping a few steps behind his wife, Queen Elizabeth II, has made
a name for himself in his own right -- for his biting tongue.
Only a few days ago he pulled aside one unfortunate little boy at
a space expo and told him that if he wanted to go into space he
would have to drop some of the lard. According to his mom, the
boy is now traumatized by his brush with royalty.

For First Husbands of prime ministers and presidents, the
examples are not much better. Dennis Thatcher emerged as a bit of
an ornery old man, taken to barking at photographers on golf
courses (which some wag explained away as all those years of
living with the Iron Lady). Benazir Bhutto's husband got into
trouble for corruption, dragging his wife's name through the mud
in the process.

Slim pickings? Well, then, Taufik could always take a leaf out
of the books of some famous First Ladies, most of them from the
U.S.

For example, he could become a roving ambassador for good
faith and humanity in the country (unlikely) a la Eleanor
Roosevelt. Or he could take a long, hard look at the presidential
palace and set about doing a Jackie Kennedy revamping
(unlikelier).

What about cleaning up the country's highways and byways, in
the vein of Mrs. Lyndon B. Johnson, so that the country presents
a green face to the world (better choice, but he certainly would
have his job cut out for him).

Closer to home, he could copy the idea of the late Tien
Soeharto and build a monstrous Mega park, a tribute to his wife,
her life and her family. There could be the Mega roller-coaster,
the Mega Museum and an all-you-can-eat Mega meal at the Mega Food
Court. It would be a natural for corporate advertising (the Mega
Mac?), with his wife's name lending itself so well to all types
of overblown advertising copy ("For a Mega good time, head over
to Much Ado About Mega Park ...").

Probably, though, Taufik will do a Cherie Blair, remaining in
business and the legislature, being at his spouse's side when she
needs him and going about his own quiet way. But if he changes
his mind and you hear reports of him buying up a huge plot of
land near Blitar, remember you read it here first.

-- Bruce Emond