Today's menu: Bad food, bad service, bad deal
Today's menu: Bad food, bad service, bad deal
By Aida Greenbury
JAKARTA (JP): With his nose pointed up, his right hand
supporting a tray full of perfectly arranged plates, the waiter
elegantly approached our table. Without any mistake, he placed
each plate of food on the table according to our order.
"Bon apetite!" I said. Finding myself only a few seconds
later, hardly able to swallow the first spoonful of minestrone.
One of my friends choked on her Caesar salad, while the other one
looked puzzled as she stared at three prawn heads floating in her
Tom Yam Gung.
My two friends and I were sitting in a newly opened upper-
class cafe in an exclusive shopping mall in Jakarta. We were
persuaded to try the place by their staff, who looked very
attractive in their Balinese gold and green uniforms.
Strategically positioned throughout the mall, equipped with
fliers and menus, they were really difficult to miss. The cafe
itself has a unique Californian interior design. Partially
covered by a clear glass roof, surrounded by the trickling sound
from the water fountain beside it. It's just a nice, comfortable
place to be, until you try their food.
The waiter came to ask whether he could take the plates.
"I see that you didn't finish your food, ladies, was it too
much?"
We had barely touched our meals.
"Well, basically the minestrone was too thick. It tasted like
tomato puree straight from the can. The Caesar Salad smelled
really fishy, because I think the anchovy was already outdated.
And do you think you can ask the chef what has happened to the
rest of these three prawns?"
The waiter took several minutes to chew over my list of
complaints before he left.
He came back shortly.
"The chef said that this is how Caesar salad and minestrone
are supposed to taste and also he was sure he put three whole
prawns in the soup."
Great! Not only were we accused of being uneducated about food
but also of stealing their prawns! The waiter walked away without
even apologizing.
The owner of the place, a woman dressed in black sitting at
the VIP table in the corner, was busy trying to impress her
guests about her new cafe. Obviously the little incident at our
table, as one of her first customers, did not concern her at all.
For about the past five years the upper-class cafe or
restaurant business has been mushrooming in Jakarta. Tourism,
globalization, an option of the MSG-infused food your servants
prepare; you can name a thousand other reasons behind the
development.
During the first year after opening, these places are just
packed, mostly by trendsetters like teenage fame-chasers, old
drunks who are looking for new places to hang out until they get
kicked out again and by the real people who have been hunting for
decent quality food in Jakarta. After that, nobody could tell the
difference between these 12-month-old restaurants and empty
transit lounges. It is generally due to the restaurant operators'
lack of understanding about hospitality knowledge, so both the
food and the service suffer inconsistencies.
How many of these restaurant owners actually understand the
industry? I would say, less than half of them. The other half
probably got the inspiration to open restaurants while enjoying a
steaming croissant in a cafe on Champ Elysee. An excellent escape
for the rich housewives who are bored with simply shopping and
gossiping as their daily activities. I know some women who own
zillion dollar's worth of cafes as their ego/image boosting pet
projects. Adequate training for their staff is the very last
thing they would think of.
There appears to be three important preparations before these
restaurant operators set the grand opening date. First, the
interior. Depending on their imagination or experience, their
restaurants will be set up with the most unaccommodating fitouts
and designs complemented with all useless unnecessary
paraphernalia you can think of. Mexican style with an all-glass
roof and windows without a competent air-conditioning system, for
example. Just imagining it makes me swelter. Staff uniforms come
as the second priority. They have to be both good-looking and as
uncomfortable as possible.
The third, which should be the most important part, is the
menu. They usually just copy it from the restaurants next door,
which explains why most restaurants in Kemang serve nachos, and
they taste exactly the same, too. Finally, add to the menu list a
little French touch like frozen Quiche Lorraine and of course the
obligatory Spaghetti Bolognaise, for the adventurous. Then,
voila, they are ready to rock and roll!
The most prestigious public relations company will be hired to
organize the D-day. The red carpet is unrolled at the entrance to
welcome the VIPs, who must include actors and actresses from
local sinetron TV series.
During the event, the restaurant owners will stand in the
center of the room, looking very proud, while their staff are
totally baffled by the situation, accepting food orders with
names they have never heard in their lives.
Ever ordered an ice tea and it arrive piping hot with a couple
of ice cube bobbing at the top? Or, have you ever ordered a dish,
described to be "slightly spicy" on the menu, and after tasting
it you have smoke coming out if your ears? Or, the most classic
example, have you ever felt frustrated after trying for more than
half an hour to get the attention of a waiter to no avail, while
15 of them are wondering around either chatting with their
colleagues or simply picking their noses?
How could these restaurants' operators expect guests to show
up at their doors to have meals, pay good money and receive
nothing but disappointment?
Beats me!