That's 'amore' on a plate at Italianni's Restaurant
Take no prisoners is Epicurus' maxim in this critical war of the pocketbook.
Yours truly is scrutinizing every solitary rupiah spent on meals now that those salad days of carefree dining are but a distant memory.
That means exacting standards in quality of food, service and ambiance, and an unwillingness to accept the token "sorry" for deficiencies in any of the aforementioned.
Admittedly an inveterate complainer at the best of times, Epicurus is now given to simply bidding a fond but necessary farewell to eating establishments, even those of long-standing acquaintance, when service is just not up to snuff.
Yesterday, the offending item was a take-out order of a slice of tiramisu from an Italian restaurant, reviewed in this column just a couple of months ago.
A slice? Let's just say it would be kind to describe it as a sliver, and the cost of Rp 11,000, plus assorted invidious taxes, was too much to stomach, even if it was touted on the menu as the famed specialty.
Restaurants seem to have forgotten the old adage that the customer, however grouchy, is always king. In confronting a dissatisfied diner, personnel should do something, however superficial or grudging, to assuage those titanic egos when their little and big noses are put out of joint.
In this case, offering a fawning if insincere apology, taking it back to the kitchen, melding the offending portion with a half-eaten one from an earlier diner, spitting on it, tossing it on the floor, dusting it off and presenting it once again with a gleaming smile would have been better than to mumble something about the krisis moneter, the pat excuse of every Joe Blow and his mother.
And with that sniffy tirade, Epicurus stands down from the towering soapbox. It is easier to do since, within the last few weeks, there is a new object of culinary desire in this reviewer's life.
Call it romance, or more appropriately amore, but Italianni's Restaurant has won over Epicurus' hardened heart in several visits.
Located in the Taman Ria complex in Senayan (be advised to enter from the Jl. Gatot Soebroto entrance, not the one near the TVRI headquarters), Italianni's blends generally good Italian food, enthusiastic service from a young staff and a small but intimate setting. And the portions are large enough that two can share meals and not go hungry if dining on a fixed budget.
On the most recent visit last Saturday, the establishment was packed to bursting with a birthday party group, and no tables were immediately available. A gracious hostess ushered Epicurus and companion to the bar to wait.
The restaurant has choice tables overlooking the complex's artificial lake, and the view can be quite spectacular at night. There is also a mezzanine dining section, where we were seated after a short wait on this visit.
Our accommodating waiter, exuding boundless energy as he raced up and down the stairs, soon delivered us a warm, half-loaf of crispy freshly baked bread, deliciously daubed in olive oil flavored with thyme, sage and other herbs.
Our tight budget for the night was Rp 50,000 or thereabouts, which we met by ordering the specialty appetizer of spinach and artichoke formaggio (Rp 21,500) and the house vegetable pizza (Rp 19,500).
The formaggio is a sinful indulgence of a creamy blend of cheeses, spinach, artichokes and mushrooms, although the latter two ingredients seemed rather skimpy. Nevertheless, we devoured it with six hunks of real garlic bread, a taste-bud enlivening contrast to those limp, butter-saturated rolls from pizza franchises.
The vegetable pizza was not as satisfying for Epicurus, a lover of thin, chewy crusts. This one was a mouthful all right, but because of its thick, doughy consistency. Although said companion had no complaints and polished off three pieces, Epicurus, sated by the bread and formaggio, had no difficulty in pushing away the plate after one slice.
This counts as the only disappointment in a resoundingly pleasant three visits to the establishment. On previous dates, we had no regrets about selections of angel hair mediterraneo (Rp 26,500), eggplant parmigiana (Rp 25,500), veal parmiagiana (Rp 26,500) and an outstanding cheesecake from the dessert menu.
While Epicurus is head over heels for Italianni's, there is a necessary caveat -- dining out, like reading fiction, often involves the suspension of disbelief.
Plastic flower arrangements fringing the mezzanine dining section, wall photographs of "healthy" Italian peasant women counterbalanced with one of glamorpuss Gina Lollobrigida in the men's bathroom and hostesses in a uniform of red dresses and two strands of faux pearls may have that little cynical being inside of you letting out a strangled cry of "cheesy".
Put it down to the all-consuming blindness of love, but Epicurus is smitten by Italianni's, disarming warts and all. After all, a dalliance of the heart, or palate, in a time of crisis makes our burdens a little easier to bear.
-- Epicurus