Slim pickings for health conscious at Fashion Cafe

Tell me what appeals to people about nibbling on low-calorie tofu next to a gown once worn by super-svelte Geena Davis?

I can understand, for instance, why watching a video of A Day in Supermodel Helena Christensen's Life is immensely enjoyable. She is so indecently beautiful that you know she is somehow up there with the Gods and we are somehow down here with each other and, well, that's the end of the story. Hers is a life movie scripts and instant biographies are made of - a life most of us cannot even imagine, let alone aspire to - so why don't we just get on with our kind of life and eat, be entertained, pay the bill and call it a day.

But, that's just it, you see. We know that watching Helena on a huge screen doesn't transport us physically closer to her. So what is it exactly about watching Helena that is so much nicer in this bopping, flashy sanctum basked in fluorescent lights? What is it about this place that makes Rp 145,000 for two almost a pittance to pay?

Welcome to Fashion Cafe Jakarta, ladies and gentlemen. A virtual reality nest that promises the ordinary folk proximity to today's most glamorous and overrated world - the lives of the supermodels.

The latest franchise to join Jakarta's "theme eateries" elite, Fashion Cafe has proven itself worthy of the hype. It's hardly surprising as the logic behind this business is as compelling as it is simple. As realities get either tougher or drearier, more people are willing to spend money in "created worlds". Fashion Cafe certainly got the target market right.

The new rich of Asia, soaking up Western products with avengeance, are the consumers of today. They are today's tourists who bring foreign exchange when recession and low growth rates have depressed home markets in the West. "Fashion Cafe recognizes that Asia is the newest fashion mecca of the world," as supermodel and shareholder Claudia Schiffer said at the Jakarta opening.

Of which Jakarta is the most prominent. The nation's capital has indeed caught up with today's perverse fascination with celebrity, and all its attendant values. Think the 1990s waif phenomenon, the designer mania, all those calorie-counting exercises. Just look at our own "walking labels" and scrawny young ABGs.

Although the popular image of models as strict dieters was dismissed by the rail-thin Claudia as "a myth", she said the menu in Fashion Cafe has something to please "just about everybody" (which means us ordinary folks). Hence the salads, vegetarian dishes, pizzas, pastas, sandwiches and even carnivorous selections for hearty eaters.

But, proving that it is this very "myth" that has endeared Fashion Cafe Jakarta to its ever-growing clientele, Chef Dan M. Ivarie recently launched his new, ever waist-friendly menu. It also sports a Low-Calorie selection which includes the Catwalk Chicken Salad at a skimpy 280 calories, the Pasta Luca Luca measuring up to 180 calories, and a range of low-calorie desserts for those who really mean business.

Of the new appetizers, the one most in keeping with the finicky ways of the health-conscious is the Choice Collection. This is the ultimate finger-food sampler which comprises three old favorites, Sesame Prawns, Flashy Calamari and Trendy Egg Tofu, as well as a new creation called Chili Crab Sticks. This being a world of slim pickings, don't think a sampler extravaganza, just a delicate melange.

It's easy to understand why the old favorites get to stay. They are all light and tasty, especially the succulent Sesame Prawns which taste even better when dipped in the piquant Thai- style chilli and garlic sauce that accompanies the otherwise unimpressive Chili Crab Sticks.

Other appetizers include Bombshell Buns, a slim burger sandwich comprising fresh vegetables, chicken, mushroom, mozzarella cheese and hoisin sauce. A bit like the Peking Duck Pizza, I would imagine, minus the Peking Duck.

The pasta section, always an innovative hotbed, boasts three new additions. The Runway Beef Fettucine, judging from its eye- popping price of Rp 35,000 ++, must be the chef's piece de resistance. The Red Hot Chicken Spaghetti is an appealing combination of spaghetti, sun-dried chilies, nuts and chicken breast sauteed in olive oil and kung pao sauce.

My choice was an unfortunate one. Pasta Luca Luca's combination of sliced garlic, basil, plum tomatoes and red hot pepper flakes could have been a superb blend of flavors, yet wasn't. The fresh ingredients were slightly overcooked, rendering the overall taste unpleasantly bitter.

Surprisingly, if not ironically, the red meat section - a danger zone to most weight watchers - fares so much better in terms of taste. GQ's Combo is a supremely tasty lean sirloin steak of only 120 grams, swathed in a light, sweetish gravy and accompanied by another two chunks of Sesame Prawns, this time wrapped in filo pastry.

So there I was, right on the spot, flanked by Christy and Claudia on my left and Naomi and Elle on my right. They are all smiling - at me, obviously. I had my back against Faubourg St. Honore, Paris' most prestigious address, and my eyes riveted on the one and only Helena strutting her stuff, flashing those soulful eyes at me.

The catwalk, the spotlights, the two golden statuettes. Beautiful people everywhere - a glimpse of Nadya here, a vision of Tamara there. And yes, Helena, up there, always.

The new menu is nothing special, and it isn't as if Fashion Cafe needs it so badly. But it conforms to a pretty high standard, in taste, presentation and its use of local ingredients. And as long as it draws diners closer to the objects of their admiration, well, Long Live Supermodels.

-- Epicurus