Short-term marriages popular in Pasuruan
Indra Harsaputra, Pasuruan
After completing junior high school, it was expected that Tuminem would get married and work to support her family. Eventually, she was urged by her parents to marry an employee of a company in Surabaya for social and economic reasons rather than mutual affection; the marriage would be contractual.
Such is the case for most girls who reach adolescence in Rembang subdistrict, Pasuruan regency, East Java.
Tuminem, familiarly called Mbak (sister) Min, is now 30 years old and has three children. Three times has she entered a contract of marriage; to the same man.
Her husband comes home once a month and provides money for household expenses.
"At the age of 12, I already knew I would be married according to local tradition. At 14, I was compelled to marry contractually -- they were fearful that no man would propose if the matter was left any longer," she told The Jakarta Post.
Besides receiving money from her husband, Tuminem works as a housemaid for a salary of Rp 500,000 (US$60) a month. Her total income is enough to meet the needs of her three school-age children.
"My husband will only provide money as long as I'm still bound by the contract, and if the children know he is their father. They refuse to call him father as they understand the marriage between us is contractual," she said.
What are the terms of the contract? Tuminem said, when her husband was present, the contract stood and she was obliged to perform her wifely duties. If he was absent for a prolonged period, the contract would no longer be legal.
"He pronounced twice that he would divorce me; but because he still needs me, he returns, we reconcile, and now he has promised not to divorce me. He gives me Rp 400,000 for a visit," she said, confessing that her husband visits twice a week.
Tuminem's two sisters, Maimunah and Fadiyatul, were contractually married at the age of 12. Both are factory workers with salaries of Rp 400,000 a month.
Maimunah has four children and Fadiyatul, three children. They have been married to many men. Maimunah admitted that she had already been married to 10 men, Fadiyatul, to three.
Tuminem, Maimunah and Fadiyatul expressed the sincere wish that they could be married permanently, although they were pessimistic that no one would marry a woman with children.
The three sisters' story is not unusual in Rembang, where contractual marriage is legal. The community, the majority of whom are migrants from Madura, consider that mature girls must marry as soon as possible.
Once they start menstruating, the community rules that it is time for girls to bear children. Similarly, boys who have experienced a wet dream are obliged to start a family and find work.
A contractual marriage is carried out much like any other marriage. There should be witnesses from the families of both the bride and groom, a Muslim marriage cleric, guests and a reception.
The difference is that a contractual marriage is not registered with the government. The groom's family should pay for the wedding.
Usually, the groom's family will opt for a Rp 500,000 wedding package, including the cleric's fee and catering.
The groom must also bring a gift to the bride in marriage. The worth of the dowry is dependent on the bride's status: If she is a virgin, the price is between Rp 1 million and Rp 1.5 million, whereas, if she is a widow, only Rp 300,000 to Rp 500,000 is required.
According to a resident of Rembang, Hadi, contractual marriages are a long-standing tradition in Rembang, but various areas of Pasuruan regency -- such as, Orobulu, Kalisat, Tampung Pajaran, Kanigoro, Pandean and Jangkungan villages -- also encourage contractual marriage.
"Society has accepted this practice, as according to their beliefs, it's valid. Some religious leaders have approved it, while other provincial government officials are against it. But whether it's opposed or not, it has become more popular," he said.
A broker will arrange a contractual marriages for a fee of between Rp 100,000 and Rp 300,000.
It is the job of the broker, who usually works as an ojek (motorcycle taxi) driver, to find a women who is to the liking of the groom and within his price range.
Hadi explained that the spread of the practice to other areas outside Rembang was due to an increasing population and the growing number of Rembang residents that moved to other villages.
Besides that, he said, lately, women worked as prostitutes under the guise of contractual marriage, and brokers acted as their pimps.
Ayu, not her real name, works in a massage parlor in Surabaya. She said the practice was acceptable as it allowed women to secure a better income. "You can get paid by your husband as well as your employer," she said.