Psychologists warn parents to heed dangers of childhood suicide

Hera Diani, The Jakarta Post, Jakarta

With three students -- one barely six years old -- committing suicide within the last five weeks, psychologists have called on parents and teachers to pay more attention to their children.

The nation was shocked on April 7 when Bunyamin, 17, a high school student in Adiwerna district in Tegal regency hung himself, apparently disturbed by his parents inability to pay his school fees.

A week later, Eko Haryanto, 15, attempted to hang himself, reportedly on account of embarrassment at not having paid his monthly tuition fees for nine months.

The most recent case of childhood suicide occurred on Saturday, when Renaldi Sembiring, 5, hung himself after his parents refused to allow him to go to a friend's birthday party.

Psychologist Mulia Muis from the Jakarta Psychologists' Association said that childhood suicide was not a new phenomena. However, perhaps as parents were busier these days, they were becoming increasingly unaware of their children's needs. Mulia suspected that the Renaldi case was due to accumulated feelings of rejection by the child.

"The child had already been rejected over things that he thought were important, but appeared trivial to his parents," she told The Jakarta Post on Sunday.

She added that it was not peer pressure that made Renaldi commit suicide, but more the pressure in the home, which he then compared with that experienced by his peers.

She said that it was possible that many children who committed suicide were suffering from psychological disorders like depression, which their parents could well be unaware of.

"Perhaps there might have been something wrong or unusual with the child, but the parents thought it was no big deal," Mulia said.

Psychologist Irwanto from Atmajaya University said that children who committed suicide often experienced a high level of frustration, but unfortunately they lived in unconducive environments.

"The parents are unaware, or too busy, and teachers are unaware as well. The concept of a caring environment is under threat nowadays," Irwanto told the Post.

Affluent families could afford to pay nannies to look after their children, but poor families could not. As a result, children were frequently left alone at home.

"Depressed kids then take a shortcut, perhaps influenced by movies, and commit suicide," Irwanto said.

It was difficult to deal with this complicated problem, Irwanto said, as there were various factors involved.

"Especially in small towns and villages where poverty prevails, and both parents and teachers lack knowledge. The home cannot provide a place for the release of children's frustration, and school is not necessarily any better," he explained.

As school was what children were most familiar with, Irwanto said that teachers needed to be more attentive to their students.

"Watch out if a student become quieter or does not interact well. Also, as children are more open with their peers, they need to be empowered so that they can look out for one another," he said.

Meanwhile, Mulia urged parents to show wisdom and have more empathy for their children.

"Don't underestimate their wishes, and don't use parents' standards all the time. They need to socialize and interact with their peers. Try to see it from their point of view," she said.