Mon, 25 Oct 2004

Parents should be responsible

I'm responding to the letter Who should be responsible? written by Etie S. Dirapradja in The Jakarta Post, on Oct. 20. While Etie's anguish about the safety of her daughter is totally understandable, at the end of the day, Etie is the only one responsible for her daughter.

Etie implies that her daughter does not tell her that she had been late to school because she maybe she was afraid. It's the parents' responsibility to encourage a loving and sharing relationship with their children. Children should know that the only people who will protect them and love them unconditionally are their parents. They should also know that their parents are the only ones that they can go to for anything.

So if Etie's daughter has not been telling her parents that she had been locked out of school, the issue is entirely between Etie and her daughter. Etie also suggested that the school should never refuse late students. It is hard to believe that Etie is serious when putting up this suggestion.

People in most developed countries appreciate and respect other people's time. Children learn from a very young age to go to school on time, turn up for appointments on time, whether it is to church, the doctor's or to a party. Adhering to this simple discipline shows respect for one's self and others. Jam karet, or procrastination, is the exception rather than the norm. Children should learn that it is extremely impolite to turn up anywhere late, as it is not only rude to disrupt a lesson, a lecture, a meeting or whatever, but also unfair to the people who were there on time.

Obviously, Etie's daughter is able to get to school on time occasionally. It would be great if her parents can help her get to school on time every day so that she does not miss out on her lessons, so that she does not get lured into any crime and that she does not have to disturb her teachers and her classmates.

The school is absolutely correct in closing the gate on time, as long as it makes the rules clear to parents and students that classes start, say at 7:30 a.m., therefore the gate should be closed at 7 a.m. Students getting locked out after the gate has been closed are entirely the responsibility of the parents.

NINA QUAN, Jakarta