On pedophilia

The article which appeared in your July 23, 1996 issue regarding sexually abused children and the need for open discussions between parent and child is a "comfortable" place to start in the battle against this sickness which plagues all societies of the world.

The article, however, paints a picture which is violent and ugly: poor street children with no guardians and no family to look after their well-being. The picture is unfortunate but allows the human psyche to rationalize how such a horrible thing can happen. The danger with this picture is that it gives "normal" families a false sense of security, thinking that it only happens to "other people" who are less fortunate than themselves.

However, in order to effectively battle this issue, there must be more public awareness of "who" a pedophile can be. While it is more comfortable for us to think that these sick acts happen to people less fortunate, statistics show that most sexual abusers are people whose children and their families share a close relationship with. The pedophile is not necessarily a homosexual, who enjoys having sex with males, little boys included. The pedophile gets his kicks from children in addition to enjoying heterosexual or homosexual relationships.

They are often family members: fathers, uncles, grandfathers, close family friends. Abused children therefore suffer not only from having their innocence stolen from them, but from an internal emotion conflict. They hesitate to expose their abuser because of other existing emotional attachments to their abuser. They know that if "they tell," there will be conflict within their family. They don't want "Papa" to get angry with "Uncle". Many times they fear that they themselves will be blamed. Just as with children of divorced parents, sexually abused children blame themselves for the conflict surrounding them. Many sexually abused children even blame themselves for the abuse. To an adult these seem like irrational thoughts but in fact they represent very real fears for sexual abuse victims.

In a society such as Indonesia where open discussions about sex are taboo even among adults, the battle to protect the children becomes even more difficult. If this problem is to be effectively addressed, statistics should be published as a means to promote public awareness about the prevalence of pedophiles. Perhaps by adopting some of the programs which are in place in other countries such as the United States and Great Britain, Indonesian children will have an advantage that the children of the developed world didn't have 50 years ago. Pedophilia is not a new disease. It has plagued mankind since the beginning of time. It is only now that we begin to open our eyes to its existence.

KALLMAN

Jakarta