My case visits 'Ibu Menteri'
No doubt there is much speculation abroad about why the venerable Adi Sasono, Minister of Cooperatives and Small Enterprises, was recently dismissed from Golkar. I would like to contribute my version of the events.
Two weeks ago, I went to Jakarta for an industrial project. I had to visit factories in the Tangerang and Bekasi areas, so I took a collection of cotton locally made clothes to get through the hot and dirty days. I arrived safely, but my suitcase did not. Garuda assured me it would be on the next flight, so I, bathed in their warm words, went to my hotel to eat and relax. Later that night, I was contacted by Garuda, who in a shame- voiced tone told me that they had not been able to locate my case. I suggested it could be in London, enjoying the Harrods midseason's sales, as I had booked in with a load of Aussies who were on their way to that wonderful city.
Three days later, still no case, despite all of Garuda's best attempts at Sherlock-style investigations.
In that time, I found that the stores of Jakarta were full of clothes for women who could not claim a bosom or a bottom, whose waist is no lower than their armpits, and who like to sweat a lot. I managed to find only a men's shirt and one skirt in 300 percent polyester.
I then discovered that Ibu Adi Sasono had been holidaying in Bali and one of her staff had taken my case by mistake. She, having a wardrobe of clothes, and not being inclined to work in factories, did not see the urgency of my situation.
However, I think what happened then was this. Ibu Adi Sasono opened my case in front of a group of other ministers' wives. In it was all my baggy old stuff and she, caught in the shame of having non-designer clothes polluting her presence, slammed it closed... But too late. The other venerable wives had already spotted the absence of Versace, Armani or that vile master of polyester and plastic, Moschino. They went out and told everyone! What shame! Adi Sasono was dismissed for letting the side down. The ultimate faux pas in Jakarta Society -- being seen with a suitcase full of non-designer clothes.
Thank you to Garuda for your attempts at finding my stuff. Shame you weren't brave enough to swing by the Sasono house and pick my case up... but I can't have everything! I am, after all, reunited with my baggy cotton pants.
MELODY KEMP
Ubud, Bali