Michael Bay's 'Armageddon': Sit back and enjoy the ride

By Rayya Makarim

JAKARTA (JP): Brace your senses for another Hollywood action movie that centers on grand-scale destruction. Those who enjoyed the last annihilation of New York City will witness yet another scene of the plunging Chrysler Building in Michael Bay's Armageddon.

This time, however, in addition, the audience may also pick on any monumental structure around the world: the Eiffel Tower or the Taj Mahal. As the title suggests, the film provides 150 minutes of what is supposed to be the final battle between good and evil that may obliterate all life.

A character in the film describes it more succinctly as "basically the worst parts of the Bible".

Doomsday this time around is in the form of an asteroid the size of Texas heading toward Earth. NASA head Dan Truman (Billy Bob Thornton) needs to send a crew to drill an 800-foot hole into the asteroid and drop in a nuclear device to blow it up before it reaches Earth. Who else could save the planet but Harry S. Stamper (Bruce Willis), an offshore drilling expert whose introduction scene shows him lobbing golf balls at Greenpeace activists?

Stamper refuses the group of professional astronauts provided by NASA and decides to gather his own team -- a group of goofs who also happen to be the best people for the job.

These include: Rockhound (Steve Buscemi), a genius geologist who is also something of a pedophile; Chick (Will Patton), a solid foreman but lousy father; A.J. (Ben Affleck), an accident- prone roughneck who is in love with Gracie (Liv Tyler), Stamper's daughter; and others, with muscles to spare and outstanding parking violations.

Michael Bay has brought to the screen other Hollywood successes such as Bad Boys and The Rock. With a background in music video clips, it is not surprising that Bay's films are dominated by sound, sweeping camera moves and a fast editing style that whisks the audience through every single action sequence.

Usually, each twist and turn, high and low angle camera shot and random sweep of sky shot creates a kind of nausea. This style however, works in Armageddon. All is accounted for due to the outer space setting. Anything can happen, and everything almost does.

Once Stamper's team of misfits is formed, and questioned: "This is who you've found to save the planet?" the rest of the film shifts into turbo-mode nonstop action. Forget about getting a drink, don't even blink, you might miss something.

Armageddon is a tightly packed technical extravaganza. There is conflict at every point, drawing the audience deeper and deeper into the blasting action. Just when you think the planet is saved, something else goes wrong. The dialog is just as quick and slick as the action, keeping the momentum with its one-liners which almost always invite a laugh, if not, at least, a smirk.

Buscemi's character Rockhound who is diagnosed with space dementia is cast especially for that reason. The first thing he says upon arriving on the asteroid is "This place is like Dr. Seuss' worst nightmare." Other one-liners include Tom Hank's famous warning in Apollo 13, this time with a twist: "Houston, you have a problem."

The cast is great. We love Willis for his sly humor and nonchalant arrogance, although toward the end, the film slows down to show a reverential Willis doing his bit for mankind.

Peter Stormare is amusing and credible as a stir-crazy Russian cosmonaut, and Will Patton is successful in playing the reliable and pathetic Chick. It is Billy Bob Thornton, however, who gives by far the most fascinating and multidimensional performance as the beleaguered NASA head who is wonderfully sympathetic for a man who can overrule a government bureaucracy.

As for Liv Tyler, the camera loves her. Just as soon as we get sucked into yet another fast-cut action sequence, a close-up of Tyler with her hair blowing in the wind, and her eyes swollen from tears, is dished out for emotional blackmail.

This film is no doubt the creature of Jerry Bruckheimer and Michael Bay, the producer-director team responsible for The Rock. It is loud, obnoxious and cut together at a bewildering speed so that we cannot see for sure what is happening, or how, or why.

There is hardly any dialog unless we include the dialog that was drowned out by the soundtrack. And one must ask, does the U.S. control the world, because it always the U.S. President addressing the crowd in every television or radio telecast, whether it be in Africa or Europe?

When you think about it Armageddon sucks you in, chews you up, and spits you out when it's done, and there is nothing you can do about it. However, that is more of an afterthought. It's a great film, though one feels almost guilty for liking it. So, as Dan Truman tells Stamper's team: "Just sit back and enjoy the ride."