Keeping your maids

This letter is an addendum to an article published on July 9, 1995, in The Jakarta Post. Here are some do's and dont's in keeping a maid.

First of all do find out how many names your maid has. Dewi, who worked for me was earlier Lily. Her ex-employer came to visit us and this girl managed to serve her tea and snacks without even a trace of recognition, let alone a smile. On questioning, she flatly refused that she had ever seen her before, leaving my friend to wonder if this girl had a twin sister. Dewi changed her name yet again to Lia when she joined another family. But what she did not anticipate was that I knew the family and the black mole on her forehead revealed her true identity. (After all she had worked for me over three months). I feigned ignorance, lest she desert my friend. I am sure by now she must have become Yeti, Yanti, Shanti, Dami, and many more, before getting back to her, if at all original, Dewi or Lily.

Never tell your maid you are having house guests on the weekend. She has this uncanny way of finding from the tone of your telephone conversation what is to happen. So hide your excitement even if you are going to meet a long lost friend. The moment you put a pan which is bigger than usual, in the hope of preparing something in advance, your maid is sure to get sakit perut (stomach ache) and would want to go to Rumah Sakit (hospital). If you think you can send her in your car with the driver, to make sure of her return, there again you are mistaken. In all probability, your driver will return to say Dia mungkin masuk besok (She will probably be okay tomorrow). If you read between the lines mungkin means no possibility. So pretend that your friend's visit is a surprise to you as well.

I have had a succession of maids work for two or three days and leave without notice. The last one at least had the courtesy to tell me that she was not happy with the emptiness of my drawing room -- no T.V., no music system. They are all addicted to TV serials and dangdut music. So, if you want your maid to be glued on to your household (TV?) make sure that you can provide her with these entertainments. If you have a parabola, you are guaranteed a maid, but you can forget about the work.

Finally, it is easier to eat what the maid cooks rather than teach her what to cook. You can spend hours and hours, demonstrating to her how to prepare a dish of your choice. The next time you leave her to make it on her own, she will make a mess of the whole thing. Staring blankly at your exasperated face, she will say Saya tidak bisa (I can't). Then, by the end of the day you would have realized that you have brushed up your own skill in cooking. So your efforts are not in vain.

SYAMALA MONIE

Purwakarta, West Java