It's time to tell your children about sex

It's time to tell your children about sex

Reality bites, and bites deep. Be warned, teen sex problems
are real. Youths need proper information about sex, which
unfortunately is rarely available at home or at school. The
Jakarta Post's Rita A. Widiadana, Irene Sugiharto and Stevie
Emilia look into the issue.

JAKARTA (JP): How would feel if you found out your beloved
teenage daughter was pregnant, or your cute son confessed he had
a sexually transmitted disease (STD)?

You might feel that your world is crumbling and doomsday is
approaching. A large number of parents could undergo such an
experience as statistics show teenage problems are increasing at
an alarming rate, especially those related to sexual activity.

In the last 20 years, the number of children and teenagers
engaging in premarital sex and irresponsible sexual behavior has
skyrocketed in almost all provinces in Indonesia.

Data released in 1998 from the University of Indonesia's
School of Medicine shows that many male teenagers in Jakarta with
sexual problems had an STD.

Two years earlier, a joint study by Atma Jaya University in
Jakarta and the Police Academy found that 558 students in several
junior high schools had engaged in sex.

In 1996, Padjadjaran University's School of Psychology in
Bandung, West Java, disclosed that 21.5 percent of youths in the
cities had had premarital sex. The figure for this was 31.6
percent in Cirebon, 30.85 percent in Bogor and 26.47 percent in
Sukabumi.

Such facts may astound most people, but if real proof is
needed just visit any shopping mall, movie theater, cafe or
street where youths hang out in Jakarta and other big cities.

Many male and female teenagers with their baby faces who hang
out at such places have been found to freely date and work in the
sex trade for simple reasons that would surprise many adults:
they do it for fun and a sense of pride.

Dr. Endang R. Sedyaningsih, a researcher at the Ministry of
Health's Research and Development Center, warned parents,
teachers, society and the government to take prompt action to
deal with teenage problems.

"Poor information and ignorance about sex are the cause of the
increase in teen sex problems," the doctor said.

"Sex education is very important to help teenagers manage
their sexual impulses, and I suggest that parents start early."

Sex is definitely not a trivial subject. It is a crucial
matter, indeed, especially since incorrect information about it
could lead to big trouble not only for teenagers but also for
their families.

Yet for many parents and teachers, sex is not a subject to
discuss freely. As a result, many youths fail to get responsible
sex education from competent people.

"Information that comes from incompetent people can mislead,
and even create misperceptions that could be fatal for youths,"
Endang explained.

Public perceptions of sex education deals solely with sexual
intercourse techniques that children pass on to each other.

This long-held mistaken perception has hampered real sex
education, which is about disseminating information on essential
knowledge about sexuality among youngsters.

"The present situation is ironic. There is no sex education at
home or school, but our children and teenagers are widely exposed
to pornographic materials and other erotic wares that can have
negative impacts," added Endang.

In the current information age, in which the flow of various
information including sexuality can hardly be controlled,
children and teenagers could become the most vulnerable audience.

Sex education has become a global need, with delegates from
152 countries agreeing early this month on a plan to boost sex
education and family planning for youths as part of a new effort
to curb the global population growth.

For the first time in 50 years, the United Nations clearly
stated teenagers' rights to sex education, and to have sex free
from the risk of sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted
pregnancies.

With the human race estimated to reach six billion this year
and to top eight billion by 2025 at current growth rates, the UN
sought renewed commitment from members to goals established at
the l994 world population summit in Cairo.

They included the guarantee of access for all people to
minimal health care, including basic sex education and family
planning resources which are still lacking in developing
countries.

In advocacy of sex education, the UN allows individual nations
to set their own standards on the ages considered appropriate for
varying degrees of knowledge.

Proposals

Proposals for introducing formal sex education at school have
always sparked a heap of controversy.

In the early l980s, the Indonesian Planned Parenthood
Organization (PKBI) suggested that sex education be provided at
school, but the government and religious leaders turned down the
suggestion.

Parents and teachers also voiced objections, saying sex
education was considered too risky for children.

Chatarina Wahyurini, a project officer at PKBI, warned the
government that sex education should be made part of the school
curriculum to provide accurate and standard information on sex as
early as possible and to head off unwanted consequences of
teenage sexual experimentation.

She is aware that the term sex education worries many parents
and teachers. "So we use the term health reproduction on our
training programs," explained Chatarina.

Some religious leaders appear to have given a green light to
the implementation of sex education in school.

Prof. Dr. Zakiah Darajat, a leading psychologist and a member
of the Indonesian Ulemas Council, believes that sex education is
important but should be closely linked to religious and ethical
values as well as other subjects such as law and biology.

"Such education must be given as scientifically as possible to
give clear and rightful information to children and teenagers,"
she said.

Catholic priest, Father Vixtus C.Pujadarma O. Carm, was
quoted by a local magazine as saying that he does not object to
sex education at school, that he realizes that sex problems among
teenagers have become very serious.

"Sex education should not only inform people about physical
things but should also involve moral teachings," he said.

Even though it is not included in the curriculum, a number of
schools have included sex education in several subjects such as
biology and religion. But students complain that what they get at
school is far from reality.

"I want sex education to reflect reality and not be too
theoretical. The education I have received so far has been very
theoretical and boring," said Doni, a 16-year-old student.

Minister of Education and Culture Juwono Sudarsono says the
issue is still under discussion as the government is reviewing
the curriculum, which is said to heavily burden students.

This is confirmed by Indrajati Sidi, director general of
elementary and high school education, who suggested that sex
education be included in extracurricular programs.

"The current school curricula have been so burdensome for
students," he said. He also suggested that materials for sex
education must be adjusted to local culture and moral values.

As the government thinks hard on whether to include sex
education in the curriculum and how to present it, information
about sex through the media keeps flowing and teen sex problems
remain unsolved.

Psychological consultant Ami Siamsidar commented that since
the very beginning, materials for sex education consist of
comprehensive information on health reproduction and moral
behavior and were being disseminated in accordance to the
condition of the respected places and the lives of local
communities.

"Now that sex problems among children and teens are
escalating, should we still prevent our youth from getting
rightful information on sex matters?" she warned.