'If I've had a fight, I go to a beauty salon'

'If I've had a fight, I go to a beauty salon'

Many people point to a lack of education and poverty as the main
triggers for domestic violence, the victims of which are most
often women and children. In observance of International Women's
Day last Monday, The Jakarta Post discussed domestic violence
with residents, some of whom said ignorance and poverty were not
to blame.

Depi Iskandar Muda, 28, is an ojek (motorcycle taxi) driver in
Bendungan Hilir, Central Jakarta. He lives with his wife and two
children in Karbela, Central Jakarta:

Violence against women happens because of the false belief
that once a woman gets married, her husband can do anything he
wants to her. Men often see their wives as weak and in need of
care and protection.

Plus, it's natural for women to argue, which only infuriates
their husbands more and makes matters worse.

It is very difficult to get rid of these misperceptions
because they are deeply rooted in society. And as long as they
prevail, violence against women is here to stay.

Ratna, 28, is the advertising and promotions coordinator for a
jewelry company in Jakarta. She lives with her husband and
daughter in Serpong, Tangerang:

In my opinion, domestic violence is a crime, not merely
"family business".

From what I hear, most incidents of domestic violence are
committed by husbands against their wives. Of course, I hear that
women are sometimes the perpetrators, like a story I read in the
newspaper recently where a woman cut off her husband's penis.

But women, especially those who do not have their own source
of income, are more vulnerable to domestic violence. Women who
already have children are also more vulnerable because it is more
difficult for them to ask for a divorce, because they have to
think about their children.

As for myself, when I have an argument with my husband, I
usually go someplace where I can relax, mostly to the beauty
salon.

--The Jakarta Post