Having one's cake and eating it

To be compelled to take only one out of many of our favorite dishes on offer, to be forced to choose only one out of two or three of our favorite television programs broadcast at the same time. How can one enjoy what one has with the thought of missing out on all the other ones?

A mother would say: "It would be a cruel God that asked me to choose only one of my children to be saved or to choose only one to be sacrificed. How could I? All of them are the very best. All my children must be saved, if it can't be that way I'd rather die."

How wretched to marry only one person when one has more than one single Valentine. And I think of Bill Clinton. Why? Blame the creator who made him, us, that way. We are all capable of loving more than one person.

There's no worse punishment to him and his faithful wife than for him to be forced to confess his very private affairs publicly before the whole world. This too in a land that claims to champion Human Rights. And I must add, who can claim pride himself to be without a stain and be a better man than he is? Most of us harbor secret thoughts and commit similar acts in the imagination, where even Kenneth Starr wouldn't be able to catch us.

Then I remember Pak Arif's way of thinking. Every time I see a waringin (banyan tree), I remember he used to say that tree is the best among trees. When I look at the sirih (betel vine), that plant is the most beautiful among plants. When I eat durian, that fruit is number one and jambu, nangka (jackfruit), mangosteen and rambutan... all of them. There's no one fruit that is number two since I so very much like them all.

"What if I were chosen to be a member of the jury at a beauty contest?," Pak Arif teased his wife. "Well, I suppose you would have to proclaim each one of them your queen," she retorted, adding "He certainly is very faithful, for I have never been able to catch him wet." Happily for him and his wife, since Pak Arif could never be considered jury material for a beauty contest.

We should be grateful that there is not only one best in the world. Our creator certainly didn't make any mistakes or errors. The elephant, the deer, the fox, the squirrel, the bat, just name any creature. Each one of them is of the very best, the most extraordinary creation. So is the melati and kenanga blossoms and the lotus, the rose, the orchid and any other flower or blossom.

Bill Clinton, though in love with Hillary, couldn't resist Monica Lewinsky, and neither could she resist him. Choose your mother? Choose your father? "Take...Monica," Si Upik suggested.

Ah, how nice, how fine, how happy, when we're not trapped by being compelled and obliged to choose only one of the many we most like, cherish or love. To be freed from the torture of choosing, loving all the best out of the very best. Men and women and creatures and things alike. That's what I remember Pak Arif told me.

CHEW G.H.

Jakarta