Handayani offers Indonesian food with live music

Just how often do you find yourself getting a live dose of Celine Dion's Power of Love, Broadway's New York, New York, Bill Haley's Rock around the Clock and Javanese pop songs all during one meal?

Well, there is such a place in this world, the Handayani Prima Restaurant on Jl. Matraman Raya, South Jakarta.

And they must be doing something right or there wouldn't be much point in Handayani opening outlets in Bintaro and Cipayung, not to mention the three in Surabaya, East Java.

Word has it that they even opened an outlet in Singapore. But when I asked a waiter about it, his expression quickly turned from enthusiastic to mournful, saying that it was definitely a thing of the past.

"Why?" I asked the inevitable.

"Oh well," he mumbled with downcast eyes. "Manpower problems, you know?" I didn't want to know. I gave him a smile. He gladly left.

Going to the Salemba area, by the way, amounted to an adventure for me. Even with the aid of the ever-faithful Falk Plan, I still got caught in the urban inconvenience of getting lost and had to ask directions. If you come from Jl. Diponegoro and turn right on Jl. Salemba in Central Jakarta, go strait to the south and make sure you get in the left lane of Jl. Matraman Raya as soon as you've passed the big intersection. Handayani is right across from the Gramedia book store.

It's not likely that you'll miss it, either. At night, it's well-illuminated, with a sign that says Makanan Indonesia Terbaik (The best Indonesian food). Well, let's be big-hearted about all this. After all, subjectivity is the most laudable virtue of PR.

The exterior, too, has signed in on the merry eclecticism of its live songs. It looks like a cross between the solid beauty- case structure of many Pondok Indah frontline abodes and Javanese joglo architecture, with stone lions perched imposingly on either side of its entrance. The interior, a rounded T-shape filled with large tables, reminds me of Lenny's seafood restaurant in Sanur, Bali. This, at least, is a no-nonsense approach to dining.

The minute my partner and I set foot inside, I was assaulted by the indecent loudness of the live band performing full blast before us. Long after we were seated, which was as far away as possible from the band, we watched in utter amazement as scores of waiters careened around obliviously, alternately clapping and singing to the tune. They did everything but serve us.

Perhaps jolted by our murderous stares, they took our order quickly and, lo and behold, everything was on the table in less than five minutes. Just as well, too, for it was nearly 9 p.m., and we were just about ready to demolish everything in sight -- even the waiters.

My partner, whose carnivorous leanings led him to choose most of the meaty parts of our selection, ooh-aahed over the Sop Buntut (Oxtail Soup). As I am the health-conscious type, I only partook of a little, and yes, the broth was excellent, the flavor strong. One complaint, though: For a portion so small, Rp 9,000 (US$3.73) struck me as too expensive.

Others have also spoken highly of the Sop Kikil (Beef Broth) and the Ayam Goreng Handayani (Handayani Fried Chicken). Although the chicken is rather expensive, at Rp 15,000 a portion, it is a highly recommended house speciality.

But, sadly, no such accolades for the Tongseng Kambing (Spicy Lamb Curry Cooked with Cauliflower) and the Cumi-cumi Goreng Saus Mentega (Fried Squid in Butter Sauce). The lamb was tough, the cauliflower overcooked and the curry bland. The squid smelled and tasted unsavory, with the butter sauce tasting only of oil with hardly any trace of butter, garlic or other condiments for that matter. Having tasted better Tongseng, notably Satay Senayan's, and better cumi-cumi in nearly every given food stall in Pecenongan, I was suitably disappointed. Furthermore, they are both unreasonably priced at Rp 9,500 and Rp 12,000 respectively.

They were, however, fully compensated by the Ikan Gurame Goreng (Deep-Fried Carp). Combining crunchy crispiness and succulence, it makes Handayani worth going to on its own. Eaten with Sambel Terasi (Shrimp Paste Chili Sauce), and the standard Sauteed Kangkung (Stir-fried Water Spinach) -- all of which were pretty tasty -- this should be enough to satisfy all hopes and expectations.

As we were resting our stomachs and contemplating dessert, a man in the audience, unable to wait for the band's interminable 10-minute recess, ran to the stage and grabbed the mike. He started singing in an unidentifiable language. My partner, after a hard day at work, began squirming in his seat, muttering imprecations each time the guy choked on a phrase. The neighboring family of three also looked increasingly unhappy and perplexed.

But we were decidedly a minority. Everybody else seemed to be enjoying themselves. The band was actually pretty good. And, to be completely honest, I hadn't seen any female singer do such a perfect impersonation of Elvis prior to this experience. As we settled into our excellent avocado juice and Es Kopyor (Iced Coconut drink), I too found myself tapping to the tunes. This sort of youthful excitation just grows on you.

Dinner for two came to a rather costly Rp 70,000.

-- Epicurus