Greetings people: How we hail and flay others in words

Greetings people: How we hail and flay others in words

By Pavan Kapoor

JAKARTA (JP): The world is becoming a small place with modern
discoveries such as the Internet and supersonic jets enabling
humankind to communicate with people at the other end of the
globe at a "faster-than-thought" speed. The world is meeting
together internationally; it is not odd to see an Asian executive
come up with a very western injector or likewise for a westerner
to be adept at using chopsticks.

Jakarta is again becoming the nucleus of yet another influx of
expatriates -- the good ol' days seem to be coming back. Peoples
and faces of different cultures are once again seen mingling with
Indonesians in zestful numbers.

Having a diverse set of people coming from different
backgrounds is an incentive for the ever curious to delve beyond
the common knowledge that Indian women wear saris and the
Japanese wear kimonos, even beyond the fact that one eats
chappatis and the other sushi. Even as the colors of the flags
vary, traditions, mannerisms and the verbal lingo diverge. Here
is a close look at various salutatory and even nonsalutatory
dialogs that differ from region to region.

Every nation has it's own distinct method of salutation. In
Southern Africa it is customary to rub toes; in most other
cultures, it would be an offense and demand an instant apology.
In Lapland your friend rubs his nose against yours. The Turk
folds his arms upon his breast and bends his head very low. The
Moors of Morocco have a somewhat startling mode of salutation.
They ride at a gallop toward a stranger, as though to unhorse
him, and when close at hand suddenly check their horse and fire a
pistol above the person's head.

The Egyptian asks you: "How do you perspire?"

The Frenchman bows and inquires, "How do you carry yourself?"

The Indian says "Kya haal chaal Hai?" which means "How is your
state and your walk?"

While salutations enjoy a wide spectrum of somewhat jocular
origins so does the art of partaking of rudimentary jargon (and
sometimes the lack of it) in people of various cultures.

The other day a friend recounted how he overheard two polite
Japanese talking in rapid Japanese suddenly use the English word
"jerk" now and then. The friend could not help but butt in and
inquire if jerk was a Japanese word. They obligingly replied that
there was no such word in Japanese -- they have to use jerk for a
jerk. One would come to the conclusion that there are no jerks in
Japan, but it is just that the Japanese language is evidently not
made for sniping at people.

It seems that when there is an accident in Japan the two
respective drivers charge out of their car seats, face each and
say a phrase which means (literally), "I'm so sorry". As my
observations of world profanity go, I think there is no language
so ill-suited to invective as Japanese.

Take the vicious insult, kisama, which means "your honorable
self"!

The Chinese language, on the other hand, is a great one for
excoriating people, and it includes such impolite articulations
such as wangbadan or turtle's egg. The Chinese understanding of
zoology is that the mother turtle is always fooling around, so
this is a way of insulting another by raising the maternity
issue.

There seems to be an issue, which exists in the Indonesian
language as well. A common arsenal hurled in disgust refers to
the excrement of a cat. This is rather strange in a land where
the local reflexology/massage masters consider the urine of a cat
to have medicinal qualities.

Japanese shares with English, French and German an epithet
that means excrement and it is used in the same angry insulting
manner. Surprisingly this exclamation of disgust is missing from
the Chinese lingo. Perhaps the answer lies in countryside of
China where traditionally nothing is more valuable than the very
same. Chinese do not denounce each other as excrement because in
the countryside it might have been considered a compliment.

Likewise, the next time someone calls you tuzaizi it is a
terrible insult, but take heart because it means a baby bunny
rabbit.

It is strange and confusing in this fusion of people to know
when some is really contemptuous of you. Some take a safe route
-- just like this wallflower who was asked by a boy if she was a
somnambulist. She slapped him just to be on the safe side.

Well, how safe can one get when someone shoots a pistol over
your head and it is a complimentary salutation, but when someone
calls you "baby bunny rabbits" it is supposed to be in contempt.