Frustrating traffic

Frustrating traffic

Talk, talk, talk is all they seem to do on the future policy
to improve traffic conditions in Jakarta -- a Rp 5,000 parking
fee for the hour, even and odd number registration plates for
different days of the week and the three-in-one system. Has the
traffic improved? Is driving in Jakarta at all safe? Of course it
is ...

The police are indeed well trained and efficient. They are
renowned for camouflaging themselves on streets. The moment a
driver violates traffic regulations, police will stop you with
the sound of their whistles. Don't worry if your car is not
equipped with an antilock braking system, they are well trained
in ninja tactics to avoid themselves becoming a road hump.
Drivers will learn about traffic regulations at a cost depending
on the type of vehicle that they are driving and how much change
they have their wallets. This also comes in a package of tactical
bargaining lessons.

In order to be consistent with traffic regulation training,
road signs and traffic lights are also beautifully camouflaged,
or at such a peculiar angle that one does not notice them unless
they are pointed out. They are usually written in such a manner
that they can only be read from a distance of not further than
two feet and even then it is difficult to understand what they
mean.

To assist the situation at road junctions, traffic regulators
in uniform are present. Dressed in anything from a police uniform
to singlets, shorts and thongs, all carry high frequency
whistles. They traverse and shuttle between vehicles, directing
traffic with a hand signal like John Travolta in Saturday Night
Fever. Indeed, most important is the sound of the whistle which,
with the same beat and tone, could mean stop, go, turn, or Rp
100.

The state of vehicles on the road is amazing. Cars, buses,
trucks and motorcycles appear all over the place. Some vehicles
are adorned with flashing lights like a Christmas tree. Some have
no lights but emit thick, black smoke with an occasional roar
from the rear. And then there are five people all squeezed
together very tightly on a motorbike. But they all have
incredible honks. Hence, drivers are trained to respond to the
surroundings. They put on their shades when they drive at night,
just in case the vehicle in front has got a large white tail
light or stinging laser beam to blind you when they step on the
brake. Loud honks are installed to blast everything that gets in
the way.

JODY DHARMAWAN

Jakarta