Excuse me? When customer service is missing in action

Krabbe K. Piting, Contributor, Jakarta

Remember that scene from Pretty Woman where Julia Roberts' Vivian was brushed off by the mightier-than-thou Rodeo Drive shop assistant?

I had to stop myself from shouting "Go Vivian!" when she turned up at the same store the next day fresh from another shopping spree, all done up and laden with shopping bags, having a silent go at the aforementioned shop assistant. Ah, revenge is sweet.

We all have our Vivian moments. In the competitive atmosphere of today, customer service is surprisingly flabby. They are either indifferent or snooty. It is made even worse when you have to pay a princely sum for it. It goes without saying that when you pay a generous amount of money, you expect excellent craftsmanship and impeccable service (the 11 percent service tax attached to the bill should mean something now, should it?).

At a newly opened sandwich bar, I ordered a pricey ham sandwich which supposedly came with a honey mustard mayonnaise. Service was slow, and when my sandwich finally arrived, it had no honey mustard mayonnaise.

When I asked for it, the attendant gave me a half smile and asked back, "Oh, you want some mayo?" I pointed to the menu where it clearly stated "Kerry Ham sandwich with honey mustard mayonnaise".

She looked at me blankly. "Really? OK then." OK then, indeed.

I have been in countless restaurants where the servers don't have a clue what it is they are serving. But combine this with irksome conceit, and you'll get to a new level of service (or lack thereof).

I was browsing for starters at a cafe when I encountered an unusual ingredient in the salad menu. When asked what it was, the waitress simply answered, "It's a salad green."

Well, yes, but what kind of salad green is it, pray tell? Bitter? Peppery?

"Anyone used to eating salads know what it is." Miaow.

Walk into any fancy schmancy boutiques without looking like a million bucks (or the latest conquest of a certain multimedia tycoon) and you will most likely to be ignored. That, or somebody will follow you around with an eagle eye, probably afraid you will soil the luxury items on display (which you cannot afford, of course).

A good friend was leafing through a rack of clothes in a now defunct department store when she eyed a certain pair of cotton trousers. Pointing to the pair, she asked an approaching salesperson for the price.

The answer? "Expensive."

In case you're wondering how much "expensive" is in numerical terms, it was Rp 75,000 (this was circa 1991). My friend promptly bought the trousers out of spite.

Of course, this kind of snobbery is not exclusive to Indonesia. Last year, an article in London's Evening Standard raised the same issue, even going so far as to rate the snootiness factor of particular posh fashion boutiques. A dressed down female reporter was dispatched to each store and -- quelle horreur! -- acted middle class by admitting firsthand that she was "just looking", i.e. could not afford most of the merchandise but wanted to try several of them anyway.

Only three of the reporters came out unscathed, with one barely making it.

Why do these people think they have the right to be so condescending? They are only employees like the rest of the population, after all. Even with a massive staff discount, I am pretty sure that they, too, cannot afford the luxury objects their employers are selling. Unless, of course, they are trust fund babies masquerading as common folks. Two words: highly unlikely.

On the bright side, there are places that will treat you like a king, whether you really are one or more like the court jester. I have encountered servers and shop assistants who have gone out of their way to help me, even when I did not buy anything. It's what separates a good establishment from the bad: attentive staff. They know we will come back for more.

A manager of a top Brazilian jeweler said, "We treat every single person who comes in like royalty. Because even when they cannot afford anything now, if they like us, they'll come back when they have the money." How true.