English as you like it

So, you want to learn English or at least learn it better. Even if you don't, there is sure to be someone -- a teacher, a spouse, a child, a boss -- who thinks your life, your career prospects or even just your vacation options would be greatly enhanced if you did...Before you can learn English, it helps to know what English is, and not even native speakers can agree on that.

That being the case, the student's path is clear. The goal is to be understood yet inconspicuous. No point being associated with a minority accent, including Prince Charles' own, when you're a foreigner already. But as for finding an exponent of standard English, you won't.

The language is as various as the lands it has penetrated. Just find a teacher you like, and do your best. Then go on vacation in his or her home country.

-- The Japan Times, Tokyo