Educator laments spread of violence in society

JAKARTA (JP): A noted educator lamented that rampant violence in society has forced parents and teachers not to teach children virtues, but how to mind their own business instead.

Toenggoel Siagian, chairman of a foundation which runs 32 Christian schools across the country, said that the apparent rule of thumb to survive in the city nowadays is to cultivate "the culture of avoidance".

"Violence, unfortunately, has become a daily occurrence for city dwellers," he told The Jakarta Post. "Let's not pretend. We can no longer teach our students about virtue. We simply teach them to survive.

"Are we not teaching our children to avoid looking into strangers' eyes, to flee from bad situations, and mind their own business?" he remarked.

He pointed out that educators in increasingly violent urban centers are placed in a difficult position. They want to teach their students the virtue of courage, for instance, but they also want them safe, he said.

He believed that schools run by foundations implement this "realistic approach" in, for instance, their policy of immediately expelling students involved in brawls.

"It is not easy to instill the philosophy of living to survive in adolescents who are searching for identities," he said.

Toenggoel said persistent persuasion mixed with threats from teachers have proven to be effective in eventually convincing students to stay out of trouble. Rather than responding in kind, many of the foundation's school students now simply laugh when their schools are attacked by students from other schools.

"Perhaps they realize the futility (of brawling). Many other youths consider it heroic," Tunggul added.

He pointed out that students are not encouraged to stand up for their beliefs, especially when violence becomes the only way to do so. Toenggoel said that he usually tells his students that "a live dog is better than a dead lion".

"It is so unfortunate that we cannot afford the price of teaching our students to fight for what they believe in any longer," he added.

Another prominent educator, Sandiah Suryono, took a more optimistic view. Better known as Bu (Mother) Kasur, Sandiah said parents still play a crucial role in their children's upbringing, especially in an era where children encounter all sorts of information and influences.

"It is best to encourage children to learn to discern good from bad by themselves, but parents still need to help by supervising them," Sandiah told the Post.

"Children tend to emulate what their peers perceive as cool," she added.

Sandiah acknowledged the dwindling control parents have over their children. Sometimes, however, less control is needed in order to encourage children to have critical minds and to maintain open and continuous communication, Sandiah said. (14)