Dealing with Indonesians
It has been interesting to read replies to Mr McLaughlin's letter complaining about the way he was treated by his neighbor. Perhaps a few pieces of advice and cultural knowledge might help him to tolerate life in Indonesia a little more. One important point first; Jakarta is not a reflection of the nation. It's the capital of it.
* Not all Indonesians are friendly (as you have been ill- informed by subsequent letters). There are good and bad, kind and cruel, friendly and unfriendly in any country you wish to name. Just look in any country's tourist brochures. Indonesia is not the only country to claim it has the friendliest people; all do!
Yes, there are, naturally, millions of Indonesians who are friendly, considerate etc., but if you possess a smattering of Bahasa Indonesian, in Jakarta you'll know Hey! Bule said in a loud, threatening tone is certainly not a friendly greeting -- Nor is Sapi lu! (you cow!) when you are crossing a road (which was screamed at me not long ago). Gembel lu! is referring to the scruffy way you might be dressed and ngeres lu! refers to the dirty thoughts you (yes...you!) might be having when looking at one of the young ladies here.
There are a lot more, believe me! However, I'd suggest that you accept these comments as a risk you have to absorb while you're here. Being Indian or Pakistani in London you might not just be verbally abused but also beaten up in the process and that's for simply having a different color skin. Just think about how much worse it could be here Mr McLaughlin.
* Next time you need a taxi, hail one down, knock on the window and ask where he (yes...he!) is going before you get in. He may not be going your way. And don't get angry if he isn't because he is too busy trying to find someone who is going his way (even though he only has a one-in-four chance). But consider this, where else could you hail for a taxi on a toll road?
* Indonesians are extremely sociable people (much to their merit) and are not used to being ignored, as we often are. So, please volunteer conversation, especially if you work in an office. If you ignore someone here, it is interpreted as a sign of hatred, not apathy as is often the way it is interpreted in the west. Complain if you wish but don't go off your head.
* Apologizing can often be interpreted here as a sign of weakness (not strength, as we are used to). To apologize is often difficult, but should you decide to do so, two things are worth remembering. Firstly, the feeling the other person might have (though not expressed) is Tuh! kan?, roughly translated as "See? I told you, didn't I?" Secondly, what you apologized for will probably be referred to again in the future, when it suits that person's purpose (i.e. a hidden weapon for future use).
Of course, there are more but I shan't go on. Suffice to say that I think you should adopt a more culturally sensitive approach and try to enjoy such a varied yet unified nation and its population. We all have problems, whether it's here or in our own countries. So, next time your neighbors tip their garbage in your front yard, pop your head out of your front door and say Terima kasih and don't forget to smile. After all, if you don't, the last laugh might be on you (yes...you!) Mr McLaughlin.
Indonesians didn't need immigration to kick out the Dutch and neither do they need immigration to encourage us to leave. The people themselves can do that job quite effectively. If you make their lives miserable, they'll certainly reciprocate.
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