Dad's Day okay, but...

This is in response to an article Indonesian dads get no appreciation published by The Jakarta Post on Sunday, June 16, 2002, by Carl Chairul.

Promoting Father's Day is a laudable sentiment. However, when Carl compared Mother's Day to father's, pointed to the rare case of the father as the single parent, and claimed that mothers only know to ask for more money, matters became a little more debatable.

Indonesian women are known to be treated as second class citizens, receiving lower wages than men. The lifestyles of mothers and single mothers, especially those fraught with poverty, apart from giving birth, slaving at the stove, ironing and laundry, and raising children today, are far from easy, rife with the responsibility of rearing a competent, well-adjusted, socially capable being. This task becomes more difficult when a single mother, whose children have to sleep each evening without being able to say "good night" to their dads, attempts it.

According to surveys, a father's absence means that children are: five times more likely to commit suicide, 32 times more likely to run away, 20 times more likely to have behavioral disorders, 14 times more likely to commit rape, nine times more likely to drop out of high school, 10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances, nine times more likely to end up in a state- operated institution and 20 times more likely to end up in prison.

I suggest Carl Chairul take a stroll down around the Indonesian courts and observe divorce certificates being handed out to women like hot cakes. Most divorces occur because the fathers have found someone else. Statistics will even show you the number of cases in the courts where the fathers have failed to provide child support and the courts can do nothing. Observe the shopping malls, hotel lobbies, and the chances are that you will find fathers with young women that do not look like their wives or daughters.

In fact, the government should start cracking down on these irresponsible Indonesian fathers for failure to provide medical and child support, and their abrogation of the rights of their children to have quality time with them. Promoting Father's Day is fine but you should not degrade mothers, for they have long been fighting for their rights in society. Indonesian culture tends to support Asal Bapak Senang (just to please the boss).

LOREEN NEVILLE

Mother and Publisher of Roving Insight Magazine

Jakarta