Conservative

By Hawa Arofah

My marriage with Srini was meant solely to make her happy. A poor girl from a remote village, she had only completed elementary school. I got acquainted with her when I was on my university field assignment in her village. At our first meeting, I promised myself that I would make her my wife as soon as I graduated and found work.

"Pray to God that I can finish my studies and get a job as soon as possible," I told her before leaving her village upon the completion of my assignment.

She only smiled in return. A sweet smile. I could not be far wrong to say that she was indeed very fond of smiling for me. She even smiled when one night I took her out in the middle of a rice field and, unable to keep my desire for her under control, so carelessly and thoughtlessly took her virginity.

Things happened as planned for me. I graduated with distinction and soon got a regular job as a lecturer at my university. How lucky I am, I often told myself with a chuckle. During my assignment I took the virginity of a village girl, yet I could graduate with distinction and be directly appointed full- time lecturer at my university.

If the sin I had committed by taking Srini's virginity had been exposed, I would have been seriously disciplined, and would not have got the university post.

It often occurs to me that my success might have been attributable to Srini's prayers. Perhaps she regularly prayed to God so I could realize my ambitions. I would really have felt sinful if I failed to marry her. So, I decided, whatever risks it might entail, for example opposition from my own parents and family, I would go ahead with my intention to marry her.

My parents, and all my brothers and sisters did oppose these intentions. However, I did not budge. I married Srini in a remote village. My family did not pay any attention to our wedding.

"Never bring your wife to this house!" my parents told me. This did not pose any problems for me, because as a full-time lecturer I was provided with a house by the university. A week after our marriage, we moved to this house. Aware of her limited schooling, I asked Srini to concentrate on how to be a good housewife.

"Don't be too lazy to learn new things and increase your knowledge," I suggested to her. And she was quite diligent at improving herself.

There was never a day on which she did not read The Jakarta Post newspapers and books or consult dictionaries. She was fast improving herself intellectually. I could discuss many things with her now. The way she spoke showed the intellectual progress she had made. A lot of terms derived from English colored her conversation: emansipasi, domestik, konspirasi (emancipation, domestic, conspiracy) and some other high-sounding words. To visitors, she gave the impression of a university graduate.

Some of my friends who spoke with her often expressed their amazement with my wife. "Your wife is really intelligent. Nobody believes that she has had only elementary schooling!"

I was filled with pride and great happiness. Srini was intelligent, but more importantly she was a faithful wife and loved me dearly. She was also very good at cooking and making our house look beautiful.

When our first child was born, Srini could already speak English. At her initiative, our son was exposed to English from his first day in the world. By three our son could communicate well in three languages: English, Indonesian and our regional language. Just like his mother, our child was always polite to everybody.

Time passed quickly and soon our son turned four years old. Srini suggested that my colleagues' children be invited to our son's birthday party. I agreed. The party was held and the children of my colleagues came along with their mothers.

Everyone was amazed to hear Srini and my son converse fluently in English. Srini seemed to want to demonstrate her English competence before the guests. Perhaps she wanted to tell them, the wives of my colleagues, who were all university graduates, that even though her formal education was limited she was in no way to be belittled.

The next day, I was praised by my colleagues in the campus. "You are indeed great! You have successfully taught your wife to speak fluent English!"

Some said that their wives did not believe that my wife had completed only elementary school.

Of course I felt very proud. Suddenly an idea struck me: How surprised my parents would be to see Srini and our child. Indeed, since our marriage I had never taken my wife to visit them. I was simply complying with their wishes. And they themselves had never visited us, not even once. It was as if I was an outcast and not a member of the family anymore.

I told Srini of my good idea.

"It is all right with me. I don't mind visiting my parents-in- law and your brothers and sisters. I'm just afraid they won't accept me. I'm also worried they will despise our child," she said.

I tried to understand her feelings. Surely, she felt a bit inferior to my parents and family.

I knew I came from an educated and well established family. All of us were university graduates and therefore very rational in their thinking. Ours was a modern family.

"Whatever the risks, we should visit them, though," Srini said bravely.

Then, without my asking, Srini got ready to leave. She looked graceful indeed. She knew well how to make herself look good. She looked as if she had just come from an expensive salon. She would surely be judged among the prettiest of contestants from a beauty contest. She charmed me all the more now.

Our son was also dressed well, and she showed her good taste and attention to detail her also. "Are we ready to leave, then?" she asked.

We went in our old car.

Well, it all happened as if everything was planned by my family. They greeted us in English when we arrived the house I had not visited for five years.

My parents were reading The Jakarta Post on the veranda. My brothers and sisters were watching TV in the living room.

When they saw us, my parents could not hide their surprise. They spoke in English and assumed a cold attitude.

I smiled as Srini and our son greeted my parents in English.

My parents were obviously astonished. They looked at each other. The rest of my family hurried onto the veranda and greeted us coldly, in English, too. Again, I only smiled. My wife and child replied in kind.

They, like my parents, were amazed. But the atmosphere only turned colder, and we were treated like unwelcome guests.

Srini looked awkward because none of my family would talk to her. I took her and our child home.

"I cannot understand how in the city there is still a conservative family like yours!" Srini grumbled as soon as we arrived home.

I was embarrassed and disappointed. I promised myself never to return with Srini and our child to my parents' house.

However, a month later, my father telephoned me. He asked me to come and visit again, along with Srini and our children.

"Please forgive us, your mom and pa. And tell your wife that we are very sorry about what happened when you visited us the other day," my father said.

I was relieved. Now my parents could accept Srini as their daughter-in-law. They must have realized their mistake. They must be proud to have a daughter-in-law who could speak English so well. Besides, Srini was also a good and kind-hearted woman.

"My parents have invited us to visit them again," I told her.

"I don't want to be belittled again," she said firmly. "If your family wants to meet us, they must be willing to visit us here!"

"But now my parents have realized their mistakes and have apologized to you through me," I said.

Srini shook her head. "No, I don't want to go through that embarrassing episode again."

I called my father and told him how Srini felt.

"Never mind. We can visit you. Your brothers and sisters will also go along," my father said.

The next day, my parents and family arrived at my house. Politely and kindly, Srini welcomed them in good English.

Studio Kudus, 1999

Translated by Lie Hua