All talked out: Who's got bragging rights

All talked out: Who's got bragging rights

On the first evening of the Idul Fitri holiday, my nephews were
busy counting how much money they made that day in gifts from
their parents, relatives and neighbors.

"I have much more money than you," boasted my six-year-old
nephew Muhammad.

"No, I have more than you," Sultan, a year younger, insisted,
patting his bulging pockets.

They tried recounting their respective takings, and still
could not get it right, confused about the numbers.

But the fight was far from over. In a minute, they were
shouting at each other, neither of them willing to give in.

Even when their mother intervened, telling them "it's not nice
to brag", they were still yelling at each other.

That's children for you, right? Unfortunately, I find that
bragging and an I'm-always-right attitude have invaded our once
modest and friendly society.

While visiting another relative's home during the holiday, I
overheard a neighbor recounting in great detail how much money
she had spent buying new clothes for her entire family, ordering
food and getting all brand-new furniture.

"And my husband has also ordered tickets for us to spend the
rest of the Idul Fitri holiday in Bali," the neighbor said
proudly.

I felt a bit happier when I heard the neighbor compliment my
relative on her homemade cookies.

Uh, not so fast.

"They're good ... but the cookies that I ordered for my family
are much more delicious," the neighbor said, packaging her dig in
a sweet tone and a smile.

I did not dare look at my relative's face -- I knew that it
had taken her weeks to prepare her cookies.

So much for celebrating the day in the spirit of joy and
togetherness. Yet, bragging rights are not restricted to the
holiday season.

Just the other day, I heard someone holding court about making
a new, expensive purchase.

"I am still confused about what type of car I will buy," he
told his audience, who nodded their heads in unison at his
quandary.

Or what about the person who goes on and on about how hard she
works -- pumping up her pride and status while conveniently
forgetting to give credit to the loyal team of people backing her
up.

Some gullible souls swallow the boastful claims hook, line and
sinker, and that squeaky wheel really does get the oil.

A friend complained that her deficiencies on this count --
lack of blarney, inability to shoot the breeze, lay the butter on
nice and thick -- was her downfall.

"I thought that people would realize I'm good because of my
work; that my work itself would 'communicate' my skills, but I
was wrong," she said.

Research shows that knowing what to say, even if it means
playing with the truth, helps in climbing the corporate ladder.
I'm not advising the "tongue tied" among us to rush off to one of
those personal development courses to polish up their
communication skills or to start practicing their delivery in
front of the mirror.

But even our President, known as a woman of very few words,
seems to have realized that it's time to speak up and make
herself heard.

In the last week, a public service announcement of the
President offering Idul Fitri greetings was all over the
airwaves. Cynics would say that she is just trying to make
herself heard ahead of next year's elections, as many of her
prospective opponents have already started to have their say.

The wife of one of these potential opponents -- the big
corruptor who went and returned all the money to absolve himself
of guilt -- was on TV on Saturday morning, mumbling through her
tears about all the hardship she has had to endure while
conveniently leaving out the facts of her husband's monumental
malfeasance.

It's at times like these that I realize that talk really is
cheap. So, do we really need to have lots of talking going on, or
should we just get the job done? -- Sheera Anwar