Why can't we spare a thought for others?<\/p>\n
The series of articles that appeared in The Jakarta Post this
\npast week about our reluctance to queue were interesting to read,
\nparticularly after my own experience of living abroad for many
\nyears.<\/p>\n
When I returned home, I was mildly shocked to notice one day
\nthat dozens of people ignored the line at the post office.<\/p>\n
After a minute or so, I remembered that this is part of our
\nculture. As an anthropologist, I quickly put my surprise aside
\nand acted likewise.<\/p>\n
It was great! I smiled and chatted with those I passed and had
\nno guilty feelings as I also attempted to make my way ahead.<\/p>\n
It even felt relaxing, a new sense of freedom from the
\nstifling rules in Europe. I felt the same relaxation and freedom
\nwhen I got back behind the wheel of a car. Hey, no rules, I
\nquickly realized! Just fill in the gaps, don't use the mirrors
\nand full speed ahead.<\/p>\n
No need to anticipate the traffic situation 100 meters ahead,
\njust blast the horn at the obstructing car bumper in front. And
\nwhen the going gets a little too hot with competing drivers, all
\nyou have to do is open the window and throw out a smile to settle
\nmatters.<\/p>\n
After several years of observing our behavior, I began to
\nrealize the contradictions in our society.<\/p>\n
I wondered why the smiling and gentle Indonesians we see in
\nairline ads and other travel-related literature would have no
\nsecond thoughts about burning suspected criminals to death.<\/p>\n
I wondered why we neat and clean Indonesians think nothing of
\ntossing a piece of plastic or old wrapper onto the ground, even
\nif a garbage can is within arm's reach.<\/p>\n
I wondered why the potholes in the street and the flooding in
\ncities do not seem to bother the officials. I was puzzled as to
\nwhy those officials seem to think they know everything and behave
\nlike gods, and nobody dares to question their authority.<\/p>\n
And why don't we Indonesians care about beggars in the street
\nand the poor in general?<\/p>\n
In traffic, why don't we behave like the well-mannered,
\nresponsible and caring bapak or ibu that we are at home and among
\nrelatives?<\/p>\n
Why do men smoke everywhere, thinking it's a joke to flout no-
\nsmoking areas, and in the presence of nonsmokers and children, or
\nfeel that it's their right to use the streets as their urinal?<\/p>\n
In a nutshell, why are we still so uncivilized and
\nunbelievably selfish, despite the symbols of unity we exhibit,
\nsuch as wearing uniforms at every opportunity?<\/p>\n
Yes, tradition and copying the selfish and careless behavior
\nof high-ranking members of society contributes to these
\nphenomena. But there is more. I observed that behavior in public
\nplaces, whether it is on the street, in the post office or the
\nzoo, is governed by how we define \"community\".<\/p>\n
Despite 50 or so years of nation building, nearly to the point
\nof indoctrination, apparently community is still very narrowly
\ndefined.<\/p>\n
The community with which most Indonesians identify first and
\nforemost is the immediate family. A second layer of \"community\"
\nis formed by close neighbors and colleagues.<\/p>\n
The community of the mosque, church or temple is another one
\nwe identify with. We treat the members of these communities with
\nrespect. We are also ready to help when fellow members of those
\ncall upon us.<\/p>\n
But anyone who does not belong to our narrowly defined
\n\"communities\" are virtual aliens to us. They might as well be
\nstray cats or rats, and we do not feel there is a need to treat
\nthem with respect. It will take a long time before those \"aliens\"
\nbecome part of our wider community.<\/p>\n
That also means that it will take a while before we will begin
\nto be polite and considerate to people we consider \"strangers\".
\nLots of work, education of adults (including teachers and our
\nleaders) and advocacy lie ahead to arrive at the point where we
\nrealize that all of Indonesia is us, that all Indonesians are our
\nclose neighbors and that our extended community is our collective
\nand individual responsibility.<\/p>\n
But there is hope. We see more people standing in line here
\nand there. And when there is a major disaster, more and more
\nindividuals, groups and businesses raise funds to help the
\nvictims, even when they are not part of their traditional
\n\"community\".<\/p>\n
Let's hope that our younger generation will learn that we are
\nresponsible for giving respect to everyone in our society, and
\nthat by doing so we are making this country a better place.<\/p>\n
-- Chris Soebroto<\/p>", "url": "https:\/\/jawawa.id\/newsitem\/why-cant-we-spare-a-thought-for-others-1447893297", "image": "" }, "sponsor": "Okusi Associates", "sponsor_url": "https:\/\/okusiassociates.com" }