Tying the knot in unfamiliar ways for lasting memories<\/p>\n
By William Furney<\/p>\n
JAKARTA (JP): Ahh, spring is in the air and all around young
\nmen have a certain spring in their step as they reflect on
\nmatters of the heart. Well, the former would be the case if you
\nwere living on a continent other than Asia.<\/p>\n
But everywhere on this earth we are approaching the time of
\nyear when most marriages take place. At this time, many are
\nthinking about or planning their wedding; and some are about to
\ntake the plunge.<\/p>\n
Many couples delayed wedding plans until the new millennium.
\nIf you take the Chinese community, for example, countless couples
\nwant to marry and have kids, not only because of the new
\nmillennium, but also because 2000 is the Year of the Golden
\nDragon which signifies good fortune.<\/p>\n
Already there are reports of a plethora of weddings scheduled
\nfor this year. Churches and reception venues are fully booked as
\nnever before.<\/p>\n
Too often, though, what is supposed to be the happiest day of
\nthe bride's life, ends up a shambles: the dress doesn't fit as it
\nshould, the flowers are not the ones that were ordered, the
\nrallies have started to bicker and a few drops of rain are
\nfalling.<\/p>\n
Even in these so-called modern, independent days there is
\npressure on young women to find suitable partners, to marry and
\nproduce offspring. Its not a pressure that has any voice, rather
\nit is invisibly inherent in world culture.<\/p>\n
And so it is that millions of couples the world over spend
\nmany months, even years, planning for their big day.<\/p>\n
In the West, the cost of a modest wedding can range from
\nUS$7,000 to $25,000. Here, costs are lower, particularly if you
\ntake into account village weddings across Asia.<\/p>\n
Since the dawn of the free-thinking revolution that was the
\n1960s, many have been shunning the traditional wedding in favor
\nof one, not only memorable, but also with a touch of fun in the
\nproceedings.<\/p>\n
Couples have tied the knot under water, while skydiving,
\nhanging from airplanes and numerous other peculiar situations. A
\nfriend was married in a gorilla suit.<\/p>\n
This Valentine's Day saw the first Internet wedding taking
\nplace. The Indian bride and groom will use their computer
\nkeyboards to type 'I do'. Surfers around the world are invited to
\nattend at www.indiashoppe.net\/wedding.<\/p>\n
Celebrity couple Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall went Hindu for
\ntheir ceremony in Bali. Fortunately for Hall, Jagger's claim that
\nthe ceremony was not legal because they were married in a
\nreligion other than their own, did not stop her from getting
\nmillions in alimony upon their recent (if not quite final) split.<\/p>\n
Gretna Green has, over the ages, been a favorite spot for
\nelopers. In the past, amorous couples left all behind and
\nsecretly made for this Scottish destination. Nowadays, there's
\nmore an element of amusement attached to marrying there.<\/p>\n
Who cares how you get married, some say, as long as you have
\nfun along the way. And who knows, it could all be over in a
\nflash.<\/p>\n
\"When we decided to get married,\" said a guest at a wedding in
\nEngland last year, \"we told everyone we were going to Las Vegas
\non our own, and they were happy with that.\" He said they found a
\nsuitable chapel through the yellow pages, dialed the number and
\nwere married shortly thereafter.<\/p>\n
We've long been in the instant era and weddings are no
\nexception.<\/p>\n
But mommy's little girl would never have any of that. Since
\nshe was of an age to think, she's dreamed of nothing other than
\nfloating down the aisle in her billowing dress, her prince
\nwaiting at the altar.<\/p>\n
While many feel they must go through a traditional ceremony
\nfor such a momentous occasion, in the current season, there is an
\nequal number that scoff at the idea. One of the reasons being
\nthat many couples, mainly in the West, are not religious and
\nobject to spending longer than a few minutes in front of a
\npriest.<\/p>\n
Therefore, if they go to a foreign country or elope, they are
\nalmost guaranteed a short service.<\/p>\n
Some commentators claim that marriage was introduced a few
\nhundred years ago by religious leaders to maintain religious
\nharmony and argue it's not necessary in the least.<\/p>\n
As many men are known to say: \"I love you and that's all that
\nmatters. How's a piece of paper going to change that?\" But, of
\ncourse, they are ground down by the woman and eventually submit.<\/p>\n
Many people detest events or holidays that see relations
\ncoming out of cobweb-infested wardrobes, forcing them to deal
\nwith people who they normally would have nothing to do with. With
\nthis thinking in mind, every year many couples take the headache
\nout of weddings by opting for foreign climes, thereby leaving
\nAunt Sally and Uncle Bill at home.<\/p>\n
Valentine's Day this year saw this writer taking the plunge.
\nIt was an easy enough road until family members became involved,
\nshowering us with brochures for receptions and telling us which
\nchurch to use for the ceremony.<\/p>\n
As neither of us are traditional-minded and not overly fond of
\ndistant relations, we opted for as far afield as possible: the
\nisland of the God's: Bali.<\/p>\n
Leaving all the details up to a hotel in Sanur, we were
\nshanghaied from thinking it would be a small affair, free from
\nthe usual fuss. For once family got their respective oars in,
\nthis boat was going firmly in their direction.<\/p>\n
One thing couples have to bear in mind -- for the sake of
\ntheir sanity and that of others -- is that parents come from the
\ntradition of being traditionally-minded. They are from the old
\nschool and have difficulty adopting ideas that are different from
\nthe norm.<\/p>\n
Therefore, there has to be some degree of concession in order
\nto keep the peace. Regardless of what you or your other half may
\nwant on the day.<\/p>",
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