'Tonglen': A transformative compassion meditation<\/p>\n
By Rahayu Ratnaningsih<\/p>\n
JAKARTA (JP): Compassion is central in Buddhism. It is not
\nonly manifested in good deeds and a nonviolent stance, but is
\nalso brought to meditation. The widely known metta (compassion)
\nmeditation has been used in psychotherapy to treat patients with
\ndepression, repressed anger and other neuroses. Another type of
\ncompassion meditation, which is a step further than metta
\nmeditation, is called tonglen.<\/p>\n
Tonglen, which means \"taking and sending,\" is particularly
\npowerful for developing compassion in one's mind and heart.
\nHowever, the \"extremeness\" of tonglen requires a person to have
\ndeveloped a strong foundation practice in Vipassana (featured in
\none of the last articles) before he or she attempts it. This
\npractice is so powerful and so transformative it was largely kept
\na secret in Tibet until very recently.<\/p>\n
This is how tonglen is conducted: In meditation, picture or
\nvisualize someone you know and love who is going through much
\nsuffering -- an illness, a loss, depression, pain, anxiety, fear.
\nAs you breathe in, imagine all of that person's suffering -- in
\nthe form of dark, black, smoke-like, tar-like, thick, and heavy
\nclouds entering your nostrils and traveling down into your heart.
\nHold that suffering in your heart. Then, on the outbreath, take
\nall of your peace, freedom, health, goodness, and virtue, and
\nsend it out to the other person in the form of healing,
\nliberating light. Imagine they take it all in, and feel
\ncompletely free, released and happy. Do that for several breaths.
\nThen imagine the town that person is in, and, on the inbreath,
\ntake in all of the suffering of that town, and send back all of
\nyour health and happiness to everyone in it. Then do that for the
\nentire state, then the entire country, the entire planet and the
\nuniverse. You are taking in all the suffering of beings
\neverywhere; and sending them back health and happiness and
\nvirtue.<\/p>\n
The initial reaction of anyone who is first introduced to this
\npractice will usually be very strong and negative. Take that
\nblack tar into me? Are you kidding? Inviting catastrophes to
\nmyself? This is insane and dangerous!<\/p>\n
Kalu Rinpoche, Tibet's great modern master, who once gave a
\ntonglen course on one of his retreats, responded without
\nhesitating, \"You should think, Oh good! It's working!\" to one
\nstudent who was worried of getting the sickness herself.<\/p>\n
Ken Wilber wrote in Grace and Grit, \"That was the entire
\npoint. It caught all of us 'selfless Buddhists' with our egos
\nhanging out. We would practice to get our own enlightenment, to
\nreduce our own suffering, but take on the suffering of others,
\neven in imagination? No way.\"<\/p>\n
He further stated, \"Tonglen is designed exactly to cut that
\negoic self-concern, self-promotion and self-defense. It exchanges
\nself for other, and thus it profoundly undercuts the
\nsubject\/object dualism. It asks us to undermine the self\/other
\ndualism at exactly the point we are most afraid: getting hurt
\nourselves. Not just talking about having compassion for others'
\nsuffering, but being willing to take it into our own heart and
\nrelease them in exchange. This is true compassion, the path of
\nMahayana. In a sense it is the Buddhist equivalent of what Christ
\ndid: be willing to take on the sins of the world, and thus
\ntransform them (and you).\"<\/p>\n
The way of mystic knows no separation between Self and other.
\nSelf (with a capital s) is one's higher or true self, the Self of
\nthe universe. At that level of one's existence one is not really
\nseparate from everything else that is going on. Ken Wilber put
\nit, \"For the true Self, or the one Self, self and other can be
\neasily exchanged, since both are equal, it makes no difference to
\nthe only Self. Conversely, if we cannot exchange self for other,
\nthen we are locked out of one-Self awareness, locked out of pure
\nnon-dual awareness. Our unwillingness to take on the suffering of
\nothers locks us into our own suffering, with no escape, because
\nit locks us into our self, period.\"<\/p>\n
Back to the \"what if I get sick\" worry. It is safe to say that
\nnobody actually ever got sick practicing tonglen. On the
\ncontrary, the transformational aspect of it makes one stop
\nrecoiling in the face of suffering, both one's own and others'.
\nIt makes you stop running from pain, and instead befriend it and
\neven use it to connect with all beings who are suffering. One
\nwill find that one can begin to transform it by simply being
\nwilling to take it into oneself and then release it. One will
\ngradually push one's ego-protecting tendencies out of the way,
\nrelaxing the self\/other tension, realizing that it is only one
\nSelf feeling all pain and enjoying all pleasures. This way you
\nwill find that much of your suffering is redeemed and given
\ncontext, that you are not alone, that your pain is no longer
\nisolated. This realization will eventually diminish pride and
\narrogance on the one hand, and fear and envy on the other. We
\nwill develop the pure empathy not only for others' sufferings but
\nalso for others' success, which in tonglen is expressed in the
\nsaying: I rejoice in the merit of others.<\/p>",
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