Simple solutions to seminar slambers<\/p>\n
JAKARTA (JP): Meeting at a karaoke bar one afternoon, my
\nfriends and I broke into laughter. We were supposed to be at a
\nseminar in a nearby hotel, listening to somebody drone on from a
\nprepared text.<\/p>\n
With the exception of Marie Elka Pangestu, Dewi Fortuna Anwar,
\nEmha Ainun Najib and a few others, seminar speakers usually read
\nstraight from their papers, only adding "ladies and gentlemen"
\nnow and then. Some manage to incorporate "so" and "well".<\/p>\n
Boring. It's better to grab the papers and read them at home.
\nThat is, if nothing is on television.<\/p>\n
Sitting through in a seminar, meeting or symposium, I always
\nfind it hard to keep my eyes open, especially when the speakers
\nhave what my friends call bedroom voices.<\/p>\n
There is a limit to how much coffee you can drink. In many
\ncases, I have to go to the toilet frequently. If the seminar is
\nheld in a hotel conference room or close to a shopping mall, I
\ntake a walk or window shop to shake off sleepiness. The trouble
\nwith window shopping is I sometimes forget to get back to the
\nseminar and end up buying things I don't need.<\/p>\n
My unofficial research shows that most people sit through
\nseminars because they don't have anything better to do. They are
\nusually paid to do so by their employers or by the institutions
\nwhere they work. Rarely do they attend a seminar for their own
\nbenefit.<\/p>\n
Seminars can be useful and exciting when the speakers have
\noratory skills. But, alas, the big names are usually used just to
\nrake in the fees. Their names are splashed across advertisements,
\nbanners and invitations to encourage the naive to register. When
\nthe seminar comes around, however, they are hardly ever there,
\nsending a substitute along with some excuse.<\/p>\n
Some favorite speakers do manage to keep their promise, but
\nusually they arrive late, speak for five minutes and leave --
\nthere goes your million-rupiah fee.<\/p>\n
Maybe you are one of the few who fork out heaps of money to
\nattend seminars thinking they are good for you. The registration
\nfee doesn't guarantee that you will stay attentive from beginning
\nto end. Boredom is very human and understandable during a
\nseminar.<\/p>\n
Instead of slouching with half-closed eyes and embarrass the
\nspeaker, there are many things you can do. One of my friends, an
\nunsuccessful painter, keeps his eyes open by indulging his wild
\nimagination with unflattering drawings of the speaker and
\ncirculating his creations among friends. A lady friend writes
\nletters when she gets sleepy. This way, she maintains a serious
\nexpression throughout the diatribe.<\/p>\n
Staying awake also keeps you safe from commercial
\nphotographers. Seminars are their business. They are always there
\nto take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the minister, expert
\nor famous artist. They then sell you the picture for a ludicrous
\nprice. You have to buy the pictures, otherwise the other
\nIndonesian participants will think you're broke.<\/p>\n
Some Indonesians kill for the opportunity to be photographed
\nbeside the speakers. They then immortalize themselves in an
\nexpensive frame and hang it on their brag wall at the office or
\nat home.<\/p>\n
Staying awake enables you to turn your back on photographers
\nso you won't have to fork out money for pictures you don't want.<\/p>\n
One last tip: Bring along a chicken feather to tickle your ear
\nin case you get sleepy.<\/p>\n
-- Carl Chairul<\/p>", "url": "https:\/\/jawawa.id\/newsitem\/simple-solutions-to-seminar-slambers-1447893297", "image": "" }, "sponsor": "Okusi Associates", "sponsor_url": "https:\/\/okusiassociates.com" }