Marriage season upon us, tying us in knots<\/p>\n
The Rajab month has arrived, with Rajab 27 falling on Sept. 2.
\nFor Muslims, the day marks the ascension of Prophet Muhammad SAW.
\nFor most Javanese and Sundanese, whose traditions are as much
\ninfluence by Islam as by Hindu and Buddha, this month is
\nconsidered an auspicious time to wed. I don't know why.<\/p>\n
My friend Dee and I are both in our early 30s. I'm single and
\nshe's recently divorced. Unsurprisingly, when we attend weddings,
\nwe're both bombarded with questions from supposedly well-meaning
\nfriends, who unfortunately often appear to be intrusive. To me,
\nthey invariably ask: \"Where's your boyfriend and when are you
\ngetting married?\" To Dee, it has always been the unsolicited
\nadvice of: \"He's a jerk, poor you, but don't get stressed, it's
\nmuch better to have a husband than not\".<\/p>\n
It's obvious why Dee and I prefer to attend weddings together
\nwhenever possible, because then we can lend each other support
\nwhen people's questions become suffocating.<\/p>\n
I still go to weddings. I actually enjoy them, plus I won't
\nlet some snide remarks stop me from coming to celebrate a loved
\nones' love fest. Other friends, attractive, successful
\nprofessionals in their 30s, stopped attending weddings long ago
\nbecause of the barrage of often insulting questions. I don't
\nblame them. If you play it too cool, people start rumors of you
\nbeing gay. If you happen to be moody and give a rather assertive
\nreply, there goes the whole sensitive spinster thing.<\/p>\n
This weekend Dee and I were invited to the wedding of a
\ndancing buddy, a shy guy who turns into Ricky Martin once the
\nmusic starts. He met his bride in dancing circles, which gives
\nDee and I some hope that there are eligible, straight single men
\nwho like and know how to dance. His reception was full of dancing
\nenthusiasts, and everybody arrived wearing their glitziest
\ndancing shoes and carrying a mixed CD. Someone nudged the DJ to
\nstart early, and people scrambled to the dance floor, forsaking
\nthe kambing guling and chicken satay, surrendering to the allure
\nof Latin music. It was a pure blast.<\/p>\n
I was just taking a break after a five-song salsa marathon
\nwith a dynamic Latino when someone tapped my shoulder. Apparently
\na college friend who works with the bride. Predictably, right
\nafter the usual pleasantries, the ultimate question ensued. Upon
\nhearing I was single, instead of the typical \"Oh you must be very
\npicky\" response, she let out a sigh. Not judgmental, but more
\nlike disappointment. Why, I asked. \"Cause I thought that hot
\nLatino was your man and I was just very happy for you,\" she said.<\/p>\n
I laughed so loud Shakira's voice disappeared into the
\nbackground momentarily. Honey, be happy nevertheless, cause I'm
\nactually happy right now. I'm here with good friends, and I just
\nburned 600 calories doing the salsa. Hot Latino boyfriend or not,
\nI'm really having a good time, so please don't tell me that I
\nshould be feeling like I'm lacking something, Allow me to indulge
\nin it while it lasts, before I return to my normal life that
\nincludes attending the nuptial ceremony earlier today. Life's
\nevents regularly remind me of my single status already. Allow me
\nto deal with it privately. I don't need people to put me on the
\nspot and expect some graceful response all the time.<\/p>\n
Naah, I didn't give her the speech. Instead, I gave her a peck
\non the cheek and made a detour to the dance floor. Dee was
\nturning and flipping with a groomsman who's apparently a much
\nbetter dancer than the groom. And as any wise dancer knows, you
\nneed a man who can lead to make the dance work. I needed to
\nwrestle that man away from Dee.<\/p>\n
It's just another weekend for us singles here in Jakarta. You
\njust smile, and salsa away.... Nos bailamos, amigos!<\/p>\n
--Miss Sassy<\/p>", "url": "https:\/\/jawawa.id\/newsitem\/marriage-season-upon-us-tying-us-in-knots-1447893297", "image": "" }, "sponsor": "Okusi Associates", "sponsor_url": "https:\/\/okusiassociates.com" }