Local foundation stresses the benefits of adoption<\/p>\n
JAKARTA (JP): An orphanage which has been arranging adoptions
\nfor decades is still trying to educate people that foster
\nparents' love is not inferior.<\/p>\n
A foster parent's bond with a child can be stronger than a
\nnatural parent's if the foster parent has been in daily contact
\nwith the child for several years.<\/p>\n
But those who have fostered a child from the Sayap Ibu
\nFoundation, established on Sept. 30, 1955, still try as hard as
\npossible to pose as natural parents to their children and to the
\npublic, the foundation's chairwoman, Trusti Mulyono, said.<\/p>\n
\"Once legal formalities are over, they (the children) move
\nimmediately to their new homes,\" Trusti said yesterday during a
\nmodest celebration of the foundation's 41st anniversary. Johana
\nS. Nasution, who established the foundation and is an advisor to
\n11 others, attended the celebration.<\/p>\n
Trusti said a foster mother said her \"heart was thumping when
\nshe was trapped in a traffic jam in front of the foundation\". The
\nmother was so nervous that the child, who was staring at the
\nbuilding, asked to go back, Trusti said.<\/p>\n
Out of an average 40 adoptions a year, one in three are to
\nforeigners, Trusti said.<\/p>\n
But it is Indonesians who seem less willing to abide by the
\ngovernment's strict adoption rules.<\/p>\n
For an adoption to be granted, several government bodies must
\napprove it before it is formally settled in court, \"this makes
\nadoption a public affair,\" Trusti said.<\/p>\n
This contradicts the intention of the parents-to-be, who wish
\nto hide the fact that the child is not really theirs.<\/p>\n
\"The motive is so different for foreigners,\" Trusti said:
\n\"Foreigners will even take disabled children, and the children
\nand parents stay in touch with the foundation.\"<\/p>\n
It is frequently reported that people not wanting adopted
\nchildren to know of them as foster parents seek abandoned babies
\nstraight from consenting midwives, Trusti said. In these cases,
\nbirth certificates do not bear the name of the children's blood-
\nparents, but those of the man and woman posing as natural
\nparents.<\/p>\n
\"A common excuse is pity for the child, who may feel unwanted
\nif the child knows he or she is adopted,\" Trusti said.<\/p>\n
But legal, strict, adoption procedures avoid unwanted pain in
\nthe future, she said.<\/p>\n
As children are likely to know their origins from other
\nsources, the foundation's staff tell new parents that they must
\ntell the children of their origins.<\/p>\n
Some 20 adults, formerly adopted children, have returned in
\nrage and tears to the foundation, demanding to meet their real
\nparents after they found out they were adopted, Trusti said.<\/p>\n
Trusti said an architectural student became suspicious when
\nshe found that her blood type did not match her parents'.<\/p>\n
When she interrogated her mother she found she had been
\nadopted from Sayap Ibu, and she concluded that all her life she
\nhad been cheated.<\/p>\n
The staff promised to trace her parents. The student was
\nshocked to find she was born in prison to a domestic servant who
\nhad served time for several thefts. Her father is unknown.<\/p>\n
The blood-mother and child agreed to a meet, which was
\ncordial, Trusti said.<\/p>\n
Trusti said the student then loved her adopted mother even
\nmore. \"We convinced her that she was chosen out of so many
\nothers. How could she study at the university if she was not?\"<\/p>\n
\"There is something more precious about the love of an adopted
\nchild,\" Trusti said. \"There is not only love for the parent, but
\na feeling of gratitude.\"<\/p>\n
The incident proves, Trusti said, that even a real mother's
\nlove does not grow in a day.<\/p>\n
Apart from educating the public on the need to acknowledge
\nadoption status and go through proper procedures, the staff also
\nface what they say is the public's misperception that all
\nneglected children should belong to the foundation.<\/p>\n
\"We now have five children suffering from hydrocephalus,\"
\nTrusti said. Almost all were sent from the state-owned Cipto
\nMangunkusumo General Hospital. The foundation is not equipped
\nwith the necessary facilities and does not have trained people to
\nhandle children who are suffering pain, staff members said.<\/p>\n
Trusti hopes that homes or dormitories can be set up for
\ndisabled children who are over five years old.<\/p>\n
\"There are many schools here for the disabled, but most of
\nthem only accept children whose families can pay for them,\" she
\nsaid. (anr)<\/p>",
"url": "https:\/\/jawawa.id\/newsitem\/local-foundation-stresses-the-benefits-of-adoption-1447893297",
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