Living in the present is key to happiness<\/p>\n
By Rahayu Ratnaningsih<\/p>\n
JAKARTA (JP): A friend of mine recently complained about
\nfeeling trapped in his present job. He apparently doesn't like
\nthe job, yet he doesn't have the courage to leave to start doing
\nwhat he really likes.<\/p>\n
Sound familiar? Recognize the repulsive feeling of knowing
\nthat we have a choice yet feeling too paralyzed to make the
\nchoice that we really want? Has the word \"future\" become a some
\nkind of slave driver or bogeyman to us, the human race? We never
\nheard our parents advising us to \"study hard, child, for the
\npresent.\" No, it was always, \"study hard for your future.\" And in
\nturn they would tell us that they worked hard to save enough
\nmoney for the family's future. We, the human race, largely live
\neither in the past or in the future, but rarely in the present.<\/p>\n
What drives us to be so future-minded? Cravings for security.<\/p>\n
Don't we sometimes envy lesser animals? Like us, they suffer
\nand die, but they do not seem to make a \"great song and dance\" of
\nit. They eat when they are hungry and sleep when they are tired,
\nand instinct, rather than anxiety, seems to govern their few
\npreparations for the future. As far as we can judge, they seem so
\npreoccupied with what they are doing at the moment that they
\nnever stop to ask whether life has a meaning or a future. For the
\nanimals, happiness consists of enjoying life in the immediate
\npresent -- not in the assurance that the future is filled with
\njoy.<\/p>\n
Surely one of us will retort, \"That is because they are
\ncreatures that are not as developed as humans. We are superior
\ncreatures with a much more sophisticated brain.\" And of course
\nthere is much truth to it. Despite their acute senses, animals
\nhave, however, a somewhat insensitive brain.<\/p>\n
The advanced evolution of the human brain has unquestionably
\nadded immeasurably to the richness of life. Yet for this we pay
\ndearly, because the increased overall sensitivity makes us,
\nunfortunately, vulnerable. We are capable of intense pleasure and
\nintense pain. We can't have one without the other. And our brains
\nlearns so quickly only to diminish the once intense pleasure to
\njust another ordinary unexciting thing of life. So our brains
\ncompel us to seek more heightened, intense pleasure, and like
\ndrugs, the increase will eventually either harden the senses, or
\nturn into pain.<\/p>\n
Surely we are all aware of material gains; those big salary
\nincreases, fancy cars and bigger houses which only give us
\npleasure in the short term. When our senses become hardened, we
\njust take them for granted. That is what I am supposed to have.
\nAnd life will never be the same again, your standard of pleasure
\nhas been heightened and you can only go higher.<\/p>\n
It's the same with the more we love someone and enjoy their
\ncompany, the more pain we feel when we lose them.<\/p>\n
Our brain is then, perhaps, a blessing and a curse at the same
\ntime. It stores for us all the memories of the past; the ones we
\ncherish and the ones we wish to forget; the ones that cause us so
\nmuch pain. It equips us with the ability of survival and
\nadaptation to life; of making an ordered sequence out of a
\nhelter-skelter chaos of disconnected moments, planning for and
\npredicting future events. Together with this, come the worries,
\nguilt, regrets, anxieties, resentment and expectation. The power
\nof memories and expectations is such that for most human beings
\nthe past and the future are not as real, but more real than the
\npresent. The present cannot be lived happily unless the past has
\nbeen \"cleared up\" and the future is bright with promise.<\/p>\n
This is a typical human problem. We are forever condemned to
\nreasoning. Unwilling to tolerate life's ambiguity, its
\nunresolvability, its inevitability, like Siddharta in Herman
\nHesse's lyrical novel, title?, we all the time search for
\ncertainty, something tangible to hold on to. Like Siddharta, we
\ncried: surely there is more to life. It can't be just what it
\nappears to be, that there are no hidden meanings, that this it,
\njust this and nothing more! How can we possibly bear a life as
\nplain as it is, without reassurance, without being special,
\nwithout even being offered some comforting explanations? So our
\nmind works for meaning, day in day out.<\/p>\n
We seem to be oblivious that the future never makes sense
\nunless it will one day become the present. What is the point of
\nworrying about what we are going to eat next week when we can't
\nenjoy the meals we've been worrying about when next week becomes
\npresent? Our brain seems to be obsessed by constantly searching
\nfor new objects of dread that aren't here now. It makes us like
\nan ass chasing a piece of carrot hung in front of its nose.<\/p>\n
A Zen student asked his master, \"What is the secret of
\nenlightenment?\" The master answered, \"Eat when you are hungry,
\nsleep when you are tired.\" Who will ever think that the animals'
\nway is a way of enlightenment? A meditative life style is \"the
\nanimals' way of living; \"aware, engaged and present.\" Our
\n\"security\" lies in the present, not in the distant future or in
\nthe dim past. We don't need a reason to be happy. We don't need
\nto dig into the past or analyze the future. The past is history,
\nthe future is a mystery and the present is a gift; that's why it
\nis called \"the present.\"<\/p>\n
And besides, there is no such thing as security. Nothing is
\npermanent; everything is transient, fluid, moving, flowing. To
\ncling to the idea of security is like the ass that, through his
\nignorance, keeps chasing for eternity a piece of carrot hung in
\nfront of its nose. Only by embracing external insecurity we can
\nbecome internally secure. Ultimately, the satori (enlightenment)
\nis not something that can be achieved by working at it; by
\ndesiring or searching for it. It comes to those who dispose
\nthemselves to receive it. This is what the Christian doctrine
\nthat salvation is the effect of both grace and good works means.
\nAs Siddharta finally found out, the only times that we can have
\nwhat we longed for are those moments when we stop grasping for
\nit. Chuang Tzu once said, \"To a mind that is still the whole
\nuniverse surrenders.\"<\/p>\n
And the beauty of it all is, by realizing the virtue of living
\nin the present, my friend perhaps would no more feel the need to
\nleave his job. This is the wisdom of insecurity.<\/p>",
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